Hypnosis has many faces, which is part of its fascination as a career. It is conceivable that a single hypnotist could cover all of its facets. Some hypnotists actually combine hypnotherapy with a career on the stage but one of the most incredible things about hypnosis is all its unusual uses.
1. Hypnosis can effectively enhance memory recall, allowing subjects to experience past events very vividly, even to the point of believing that they are consciously present at these events. How far can this go? And as you may have heard, some people think hypnosis can recover memories from a past lifetime.
2. Forensic hypnosis has been used often in enhancing the memory of participants in criminal court cases, primarily with victims or witnesses to enhance the memory of the event. It was used in the cases of Ted Bundy, Sam Shepherd and Albert DeSalvo, the Boston Strangler. In the case of DeSalvo, it was used with the defendant himself.
3. Hypnosis can induce a partial or almost complete state of anaesthesia, making subjects or patients oblivious to the surgeon's knife, a state presumably similar to that of an Indian fakir, who can stick needles into his arm or lie on a bed of nails without experiencing pain.
4. Another, scientifically verifiable aspect of hypnosis is the ability to create positive hallucinations. When I was in elementary school, I read a book on hypnosis that claimed that the hypnotist had created, for himself, a little pink elephant that followed him around all the time. The trouble was that he couldn't get rid of it right away. He had forgotten to suggest the possibility for removal of that little pink phantom. That really impressed me as to the potential of hypnosis.
5. Hypnosis can be used to create relaxation during contractions in childbirth. It also helps to create a positive, trusting attitude toward the labor and birthing processes. Stress hormones are eliminated that are fundamentally responsible for the pain in childbirth. Instead, wonderful endorphins that are your body's natural pain relievers (and nature's love drug) are elevated, thus keeping the laboring mother in a state of relaxation and having a sense of well-being.
6. One extraordinary use of hypnosis is involved with overcoming specific phobias. Phobias are deeply held unconscious fears which affect a person?s whole life and psychological well-being.
7. Perhaps one of the most important aspects of hypnosis is its ability to suggest and influence courses of action to people both inside of and outside the hypnotic trance. A suggestion given within a state of hypnosis that will have effect outside is called a post-hypnotic suggestion. These types of suggestions can have a profound and meaningful effect when trying to influence discordant habitual behaviour like smoking or gambling.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Your Energy Level Determines Your Luck
Many people think that luck is something that is purely random, unpredictable and difficult to control. That is because they do not know what luck really is. When you are able to know the true definition of luck, you can learn the whole science behind this phenomena and gain control over it.
Luck is another aspect of your reality and perhaps the most powerful and important one. The more conscious and aware you become of the elements of your reality, the more of a conscious and powerful creator you will be.
Your luck is your psychokinetic resonance with the environment you are in. Like everything else, luck is an energy. It is something that is quantifiable not in physical but in nonphysical ways. You can quantify it physically only in terms of its physical manifestations in your life. Luck is dependent on time, place and consciousness.
When you are lucky, you are in mental and emotional resonance with your surroundings.
When you are unlucky, it is the opposite. The level of resonance is the level of your luck.
Luck is also a feeling or emotion because emotion is energy in motion. When you are lucky, you are also feeling lucky. Your feeling is your vibration and therefore you are vibrating luck and feeing it. You feel and experience that everything is working for you when you are lucky.
You feel that everything is working against you when you aren't lucky. A state of vibrational harmony or disharmony with your environment is the whole explanation for this. You either feel that things are in a flow or things are disrupted.
Your energy level determines your luck vibration. At times when you are feeling low of energy, that is also when your luck vibration is at a low point. You are more likely to make careless mistakes, become more accident prone and flop up in some way. When you are feeling high of energy, that is also when your luck vibration is in a high state. You are sharper, clearer and more in the zone. You seem to be able to do amazing things in ways that baffle others to the point that makes you seem very skillful or lucky.
Actually luck and skill are one. The more in energetic resonance you are with your environment, the more your skill will work and the luckier you'll seem. You can always observe that when the best are in action, they always seem to have both their skill and the situation working for them. You can never separate luck from skill because after all, they are both part of the same thing called psychokinetic resonance with the environment. Your skill is your capability of handling the situation which depends on luck.
Once you know that luck is an energy, you can depend on it in that manner. You cannot depend on luck that is considered to be random chance occurrence. You can't depend on such things because they do not exist. A non existent thing cannot be depended upon. Everything that exists is a part of consciousness and can be controlled by consciousness. Therefore luck exist and is fully under your control. Knowing this, you never have to fear of bad luck because you can make all things work in your favor.
Since luck is dependent on energy, you have to pay attention to your level of energy in every moment and take charge of it. When you notice that your energy level is low, be more careful with the things you do especially if they are important. You may make mistakes that usually never happen, and wonder how could you be so unlucky or stupid.
You may realize that every time you have made careless or stupid mistakes that seem to be like bad luck, it was when your energy level was indeed at a low point.
Lack of focus and lack of being adequately present minded also creates bad luck. Do you notice that when you make stupid mistakes in situations, you felt that you were not ready? What do you mean by not being ready? You mean that you weren't focusing properly or fully enough, and you weren't being adequately present minded. The first step to controlling luck is to be present minded. If you want to be lucky, you must put your focus in the activity you are doing. Or else you'd create bad luck and mistakes.
Your level of focus and placing your mind in the present determines your psychokinetic resonance with the environment. Focusing is how you channel energy towards a particular time and place. When your focus is here, your energy is channeled here and you experience luck here. Where you focus is where you generate luck in. That is why the secret of success is focus. Successful people are lucky people because they have more focus than the unsuccessful and unlucky ones. Focus to be a lucky one.
Seek to maintain a high level of energy or vibration at all times. People who experience their luck going up and down throughout the day allow their energy to go up and down. People who experience their luck being consistently high all the time maintain their energy and vibration at a high level. At times when your energy is low, seek to increase it to a higher level again. Do not continue doing any work at a low level of energy because you will tend to make mistakes. Recharge your energy first, then work.
Be aware of negative thoughts and feelings that will bring your level of energy or vibration lower. Positive thoughts and feelings bring your energy level and vibrations higher. Therefore choose to think positive thoughts and feel positive emotions, and you will experience more luck and success in your life. You can also increase your luck when you are more intent of succeeding in a certain situation. Your energy of intent will energize you with the luck you need, and that is why willful intent bends the world to you.
Luck is another aspect of your reality and perhaps the most powerful and important one. The more conscious and aware you become of the elements of your reality, the more of a conscious and powerful creator you will be.
Your luck is your psychokinetic resonance with the environment you are in. Like everything else, luck is an energy. It is something that is quantifiable not in physical but in nonphysical ways. You can quantify it physically only in terms of its physical manifestations in your life. Luck is dependent on time, place and consciousness.
When you are lucky, you are in mental and emotional resonance with your surroundings.
When you are unlucky, it is the opposite. The level of resonance is the level of your luck.
Luck is also a feeling or emotion because emotion is energy in motion. When you are lucky, you are also feeling lucky. Your feeling is your vibration and therefore you are vibrating luck and feeing it. You feel and experience that everything is working for you when you are lucky.
You feel that everything is working against you when you aren't lucky. A state of vibrational harmony or disharmony with your environment is the whole explanation for this. You either feel that things are in a flow or things are disrupted.
Your energy level determines your luck vibration. At times when you are feeling low of energy, that is also when your luck vibration is at a low point. You are more likely to make careless mistakes, become more accident prone and flop up in some way. When you are feeling high of energy, that is also when your luck vibration is in a high state. You are sharper, clearer and more in the zone. You seem to be able to do amazing things in ways that baffle others to the point that makes you seem very skillful or lucky.
Actually luck and skill are one. The more in energetic resonance you are with your environment, the more your skill will work and the luckier you'll seem. You can always observe that when the best are in action, they always seem to have both their skill and the situation working for them. You can never separate luck from skill because after all, they are both part of the same thing called psychokinetic resonance with the environment. Your skill is your capability of handling the situation which depends on luck.
Once you know that luck is an energy, you can depend on it in that manner. You cannot depend on luck that is considered to be random chance occurrence. You can't depend on such things because they do not exist. A non existent thing cannot be depended upon. Everything that exists is a part of consciousness and can be controlled by consciousness. Therefore luck exist and is fully under your control. Knowing this, you never have to fear of bad luck because you can make all things work in your favor.
Since luck is dependent on energy, you have to pay attention to your level of energy in every moment and take charge of it. When you notice that your energy level is low, be more careful with the things you do especially if they are important. You may make mistakes that usually never happen, and wonder how could you be so unlucky or stupid.
You may realize that every time you have made careless or stupid mistakes that seem to be like bad luck, it was when your energy level was indeed at a low point.
Lack of focus and lack of being adequately present minded also creates bad luck. Do you notice that when you make stupid mistakes in situations, you felt that you were not ready? What do you mean by not being ready? You mean that you weren't focusing properly or fully enough, and you weren't being adequately present minded. The first step to controlling luck is to be present minded. If you want to be lucky, you must put your focus in the activity you are doing. Or else you'd create bad luck and mistakes.
Your level of focus and placing your mind in the present determines your psychokinetic resonance with the environment. Focusing is how you channel energy towards a particular time and place. When your focus is here, your energy is channeled here and you experience luck here. Where you focus is where you generate luck in. That is why the secret of success is focus. Successful people are lucky people because they have more focus than the unsuccessful and unlucky ones. Focus to be a lucky one.
Seek to maintain a high level of energy or vibration at all times. People who experience their luck going up and down throughout the day allow their energy to go up and down. People who experience their luck being consistently high all the time maintain their energy and vibration at a high level. At times when your energy is low, seek to increase it to a higher level again. Do not continue doing any work at a low level of energy because you will tend to make mistakes. Recharge your energy first, then work.
Be aware of negative thoughts and feelings that will bring your level of energy or vibration lower. Positive thoughts and feelings bring your energy level and vibrations higher. Therefore choose to think positive thoughts and feel positive emotions, and you will experience more luck and success in your life. You can also increase your luck when you are more intent of succeeding in a certain situation. Your energy of intent will energize you with the luck you need, and that is why willful intent bends the world to you.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
The 4 Keys Of Turning Your Thoughts Into Your Desired Reality
1. Ask, Believe, Expect, & Receive
Pretty basic. Sums up the whole theory of the Law of Attraction, manifesting, and reality creation in 5 little words. Ask what you want, believe you're going to get it, expect to receive it, and receive! This first step is pretty big though. In order for you to believe, expect, and receive, you've got to break down your negative limiting beliefs, get in touch with who you are, and become more self-aware. Some awesome techniques to get you there are meditations, visualization exercises, journaling, and gratitude.
2. Let It Go & Relax
This kinda comes down to my last post about letting go of attachment. You've already done what is required of you so just relax. Feel good, be happy, and know that what you want is coming to you. When you think about your desire, fantasize about it, or dream about it focus on what makes you feel good and how good you'll feel when you get it. This way, the Universe will pick up on these vibrations because they're aligned with what you want.
3. Focus On What You Want
Really focus on what you desire by letting the outcome play out in your thoughts. Write about it, fantasize about it, even meditate on it. The more you do this the faster your desire will materialize. And of course, be crystal clear on what your desires are.
4. Don't Be Overly Concerned With How It's Going To Work
Again. Don't overly obsess. Follow your intuition and your inner guidance. They will let you know what to do and what action steps you need to take in order to manifest your desires. So don't worry so much about the HOW and know that everything will come in due time.
Pretty basic. Sums up the whole theory of the Law of Attraction, manifesting, and reality creation in 5 little words. Ask what you want, believe you're going to get it, expect to receive it, and receive! This first step is pretty big though. In order for you to believe, expect, and receive, you've got to break down your negative limiting beliefs, get in touch with who you are, and become more self-aware. Some awesome techniques to get you there are meditations, visualization exercises, journaling, and gratitude.
2. Let It Go & Relax
This kinda comes down to my last post about letting go of attachment. You've already done what is required of you so just relax. Feel good, be happy, and know that what you want is coming to you. When you think about your desire, fantasize about it, or dream about it focus on what makes you feel good and how good you'll feel when you get it. This way, the Universe will pick up on these vibrations because they're aligned with what you want.
3. Focus On What You Want
Really focus on what you desire by letting the outcome play out in your thoughts. Write about it, fantasize about it, even meditate on it. The more you do this the faster your desire will materialize. And of course, be crystal clear on what your desires are.
4. Don't Be Overly Concerned With How It's Going To Work
Again. Don't overly obsess. Follow your intuition and your inner guidance. They will let you know what to do and what action steps you need to take in order to manifest your desires. So don't worry so much about the HOW and know that everything will come in due time.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
How to Become a Master of Life
How to Become a Master of Life
By Stuart Goldsmith / Author of The Midas Method
Do you sometimes feel stressed and fed-up with life? Want to be happy? Joyful? Well I wonder if joy really is the state to aim for... Is it even possible?
When you think about it, intense happiness and joy are, by their nature, short lived. Note the use of the words 'by their nature.' This implies that you cannot artificially sustain joy, say by maintaining or increasing the stimulus which produced it.
You know those Amazonian insect-eating plants? Once an insect has triggered the plant to close, no amount of further stimulation will have the slightest effect for several hours. You can put that plant on a lead and take it for a walk through a swarm of flies, and its lips will remain stubbornly sealed.
Our 'joy' mechanism is similar.
Once triggered, it activates, and then a certain time period must elapse before it can be triggered again. It is has filled its purpose; I will explain what that is in a moment.
The same is true of intense happiness. We feel this fleeting, wonderfully positive response when one of our needs starts to be met.
Carefully note those last words.
I did not say 'when one of our needs is fully met.' Joy or intense happiness is our reward to ourselves for taking good care of the organism, just as pain is the opposite.
Our Needs
We have many needs, as I am sure you know.
First in the hierarchy come our physical needs (food, water, warmth, safety, shelter, sex, touch etc...). Many of these are essential for our physical survival and so these become pressing if not met. We feel intense and desperate pain (thirst, hunger, cold) and an intense joy at the first sip of water, morsel of food or warmth of the blanket thrown around our shoulders. But this quickly wears off because that need has now been satisfied. More (or prolonged) warmth, more food or more water bring diminishing returns in happiness.
Soon we pass into boredom and indifference about those needs. We decline the third helping of swan's breast and wearily wave away the fifth overflowing goblet of mead and... isn't it getting a little warm in here? Can somebody please stop throwing peasants onto the fire...
Eventually, other needs come to the surface - the need to be cool, the need to rest and digest. Whereas before, the cold wind caused the most intense agony and you longed for a good crackling fire to warm your bottom against, now the cold breeze from the open window feels good against your face.
You feel a momentary flash of joy...
How It All Began
In mankind's distant past, our physical needs were mostly all we took care of. Food, water, shelter, sex, warmth - that was what it was all about.
Fast forward one million years and many of us have cracked the 'physical needs' thing. Douglas Adams described the three stages of man's evolution as "How shall we eat?" "What shall we eat?" and "Where shall we do lunch?" Well, we're at the 'doing lunch' stage now, at least in the Western world. For the main part we are all more than adequately fed, watered and housed. Actually, this is a gross understatement - we luxuriate in a massive surplus of these things.
But we are far more than a collection of physical needs. We also have a whole range of intellectual and emotional needs. We also have 'spiritual' needs in the sense of wanting answers to "what's it all about?" questions and wanting to make sense of our life as a whole and attain meaning.
Let's call these our ‘higher' needs.
Higher Needs
Examples of 'higher level' needs include our need for love, meaning, contribution, efficacy, beauty, order, companionship, excitement, respect, authenticity, choice, trust, harmony -- the list is a very long one (at least two dozen needs).
Which Are More Important?
The temptation here is to class these 'higher level' needs as less important than the lower level. In just one way, they are.
Non-fulfilment of lower level needs often leads to death - the actual extinction of the organism. Not filling higher level needs rarely has this effect. But there, the difference ends.
The purpose of life is not brute survival at any cost. The purpose is to survive as a man or woman, with all that this implies. To both surive and to thrive. Thriving requires that your higher level needs are also met. If they are not met, the result will be misery, defeat, low self esteem and low energy.
If too many of your needs are not met for a long period, the result will be depression in all of its guises and possibly even psychosis or suicide. Yes, lack of water will kill the organism called 'man' in a few days; but solitary confinement will kill a man (not the organism but his spirit) in a few months.
Starvation will kill a woman in two weeks; but total lack of love, warmth or affection will kill a woman (not the organism but her spirit) in a few short years.
I do not mean to imply that men and women have a different set of needs. They do not. All humans share an identical set of needs.
The Cyclical Nature of Needs
Our higher level needs are also cyclical. One example should suffice.
We have a need for companionship - we are social creatures by nature. This implies that our need for companionship is not optional. If we do not fill this need we start to feel pain. So imagine now being in solitary confinement (enforced or accidental).
After two or three days you feel discomfort. As the days of solitude accrue, you feel more intense pain - the pain of deep loneliness and the strong desire to see another human face or hear a voice.
If this continues indefinitely, the result is depression and even suicide. Can you possibly imagine that you might say: "Leave me alone! I want to be by myself! I need my space!"? No, this seems inconceivable. But let us see...
Suppose after months of confinement, you receive a visitor. What intense joy! What rapture! You cling on to the person, greedily devouring every line and wrinkle in their face; sucking up their words like a parched traveler in a desert.
Too Much of a Good Thing?
Now I want you to imagine a second visitor and a third - all friends and much loved family. Such happiness! You greet them all warmly. Now a fourth and a fifth; soon fifty well-wishers and friends are crowded into your room.
Hours pass, you start to feel weary. So many people, so much talk. You start to long for some peace and quiet. But your guests have no intention of going. They stay and stay - for hours, then days. They crowd your bedroom whist you sleep, lovingly watching over you. They crowd your living room whilst you are awake, cuddling you, kissing you, touching you - saying nice things.
Gradually it becomes unbearable. You long for solitude. Your need for companionship has been sated and your need for space and quiet is now urgent. You scream out in pain: "Please! Will you all just GO AWAY! I want to be alone! I need space!"
To dark mutterings of “Well! Of all the ungrateful...” they stalk off into the night, leaving you with that which you most need at present... solitude.
And so it goes on, round and round. You could call this a 'cycle of needs.'
I like to imagine this as one of the those Hi Fi volume meters made up of moving illuminated bars (like a bar chart).
Each bar represents a need, the current level of the bar indicating the intensity of that need at any one moment. They never stand still. They dance up and down as each need is either met, or comes to the foreground demanding to be met.
The further below the mid line a bar drops, the more pain you feel. This triggers you into action to get that need met and hopefully the bar comes up to midway - the object is to keep it there.
If it goes above midway, you have overfilled that need (too much food, too much warmth, too much companionship); this also causes pain and triggers you to further action.
[Aside: Can you have too much of seemingly positive things like love or harmony? Sure you can! Imagine a cloying, overbearing lover who will not leave your side for one second and who strums lutes below your lighted window each night - or a 100% harmonious world with never an argument, never a disagreement, everything always being perfect.]
You could say that everything you do in life is a strategy for keeping those bars all in a line, in the middle. Often our strategies are misguided and even counterproductive, but still the intention is to fill a need.
No Final Result
Of course this is a dynamic thing, like juggling. It is never static.
There is never a time - not once in your entire life - where you can sit back and admire your straight line of bars, secure in the knowledge that they will remain that way for longer than a few moments.
A juggler can never relax her concentration and have the balls remain in a perfect arc above her head. And here's the really important bit: even when those bars are in a line, it does not produce joy or ecstatic happiness. These, as we have seen, are our brief reward for starting to fill an urgent, chronic need.
So what do you think is the emotion corresponding to a full set of well-filled needs?
Contentment.
Now we are getting closer to a sustainable and desirable state to aim for.
Everyone thinks they want to be blissfully happy, (in this particular article I am using this word in the sense of intense happiness bordering on joy.) In fact, this is unsustainable by any means - just as the fly trap cannot munch its way through an endless queue of suicidal bluebottles. It is not in the nature of the plant to do this. It is not in our nature to feel constant joy.
This is such an important point that I want you to be very clear about it. As an organism, it is not the case that our purpose is to move towards a state of permanent intense happiness (joy), any more than the juggler aims to attain a perfect frozen arc of equally-spaced balls above her head so that she might relax, arms folded.
So what is our purpose?
It is to maintain a state of dynamic equilibrium - neither too hot, nor too cold; neither too tired, nor over-rested; neither starving, nor bloated.
To achieve this, evolution has provided us with two important feelings: pain and pleasure. Pain is the stick, goading us away from danger, chronic lack, or massive excess. Pleasure is the carrot, enticing us to act in a way that gets it just right - perfectly balanced. Both have the purpose of getting us to act - to do something to restore equilibrium.
Once equilibrium has been achieved, the feeling is not one of intense, prolonged happiness (that is our reward for starting to fill a much neglected need.) The result is equilibrium for the organism and we experience this as a quality of contentment.
Become a Master Juggler of Life
If we become a master juggler of life and get the hang of keeping those tricky bars all in a row, or balls in the air, our reward is deep and lasting contentment.
Since words have many meanings, let me be a little more specific about this state. You feel that all is right with your world (which, of course, it is). You feel calm, in flow, certain, in focus, open, poised, sensitive and clear.
Other people will feel a very special quality about you and want to be close to it - they crave it too, just as every human being does. Life seems easy for you. You wonder why on earth you struggled and strained for so many years, wracked by guilt, angst, pain and unhappiness.
The reason is that you were not, at that point, a master of life.
To push the juggler analogy a teensy bit further; top jugglers like Brad Byers spend years learning exactly how to keep all of those balls or clubs flying in an arc above his head. I imagine that at times it seemed impossible; he felt like giving up. He was probably often frustrated, angry and despairing about ever being able to do such a difficult thing. But having mastered it, the process now is almost effortless for him. When juggling, he is in a 'flow' state - not struggling, sweating and striving to maintain the arc, but calm, certain, almost in a meditative state.
Happiness Is Not Natural
Is contentment the 'natural' human state?
Well, that depends on what you mean by 'natural.' Our default condition is not one of contentment.
It is entirely incorrect to say that if you do nothing, let go or drop out then you will default to a 'natural' state of contentment. The exact opposite is true, in fact.
If you seek contentment you are required to engage in a constant, relentless struggle with nature and reality (required by your essential nature, that is).
Disengaging with this struggle, as you might expect, rapidly produces discontentment closely followed by unhappiness, pain and then death. All the balls come tumbling to the ground and the audience holds it breath, wondering if this is a joke or whether they are witnessing a disaster.
Books, courses and religions which claim that man's 'natural' state is one of happiness are just plain wrong - as wrong as a book on juggling which claims that the balls 'naturally' want to be in a neat arc and that your task as a juggler is to 'get in touch' with this natural state and 'release' the balls to 'do their own thing'...
Mankind's 'natural' state is one of constant struggle to maintain equilibrium. His reward for this, if he masters it, is contentment.
Does all this talk about 'constant struggle' put you off? Perhaps you are thinking that happiness and even contentment are now well out of your reach?
Not so.
Just because you are engaged in a lifelong 'dance' with nature, does not mean that it is arduous, deeply painful and harsh - although it can be these things if you get it wrong. The truth is that it is possible to be content because our needs are not that difficult to meet, particularly these days. Not easy, but not that hard either.
The reason we feel such discontent, pain, unhappiness and angst is mainly because of false information leading to erroneous and completely incorrect strategies for filling our needs.
How to Become A Master of Life
I want to summarise the important things I have been explaining to you:
1. You have many needs, both 'lower level' (e.g. food) and 'higher level' (e.g. love).
2. Your needs are the 'voice' of the organism called a 'human being' telling you what it needs for survival as a human (not survival at any level, e.g. as a cringing, naked half-starved beast.)
3. Your needs are never filled, finally, for all time. They are cyclical. Your two dozen (or so) needs cycle round and around. At any one moment, several are urgently screaming at you, a few are muttering for attention and others are satisfied - for now.
4. When a need is not filled, you feel discomfort and then pain. This is the human organism's method of alerting the higher part of your mind (the strategy part) to come up with some plans, pronto, for filling that need.
5. If a need has been unfilled for a long time, when you attend to it you feel a burst of an emotion we call 'joy.' This is your instant reward for getting started. It is not a sustainable feeling.
6. Gradually, as you master how to juggle your needs and respond to them in a timely fashion, your reward is a feeling we call 'contentment.'
7. The trick is to become a 'master of life' - a master juggler. This is not a 'natural' state. You need to work at it and practice it. You also need an instructor. (If you have ever tried your hand at juggling, you will know it is impossible to learn, by yourself, from first principles. But if someone shows you the step-by-step method, then anyone can learn to juggle three balls in around five hours. Five balls? Come back in five years!)
In case you have not yet realised this fact, it is going to take time for you to become a ‘master of life'.
A good time to start is... now.
By Stuart Goldsmith / Author of The Midas Method
Do you sometimes feel stressed and fed-up with life? Want to be happy? Joyful? Well I wonder if joy really is the state to aim for... Is it even possible?
When you think about it, intense happiness and joy are, by their nature, short lived. Note the use of the words 'by their nature.' This implies that you cannot artificially sustain joy, say by maintaining or increasing the stimulus which produced it.
You know those Amazonian insect-eating plants? Once an insect has triggered the plant to close, no amount of further stimulation will have the slightest effect for several hours. You can put that plant on a lead and take it for a walk through a swarm of flies, and its lips will remain stubbornly sealed.
Our 'joy' mechanism is similar.
Once triggered, it activates, and then a certain time period must elapse before it can be triggered again. It is has filled its purpose; I will explain what that is in a moment.
The same is true of intense happiness. We feel this fleeting, wonderfully positive response when one of our needs starts to be met.
Carefully note those last words.
I did not say 'when one of our needs is fully met.' Joy or intense happiness is our reward to ourselves for taking good care of the organism, just as pain is the opposite.
Our Needs
We have many needs, as I am sure you know.
First in the hierarchy come our physical needs (food, water, warmth, safety, shelter, sex, touch etc...). Many of these are essential for our physical survival and so these become pressing if not met. We feel intense and desperate pain (thirst, hunger, cold) and an intense joy at the first sip of water, morsel of food or warmth of the blanket thrown around our shoulders. But this quickly wears off because that need has now been satisfied. More (or prolonged) warmth, more food or more water bring diminishing returns in happiness.
Soon we pass into boredom and indifference about those needs. We decline the third helping of swan's breast and wearily wave away the fifth overflowing goblet of mead and... isn't it getting a little warm in here? Can somebody please stop throwing peasants onto the fire...
Eventually, other needs come to the surface - the need to be cool, the need to rest and digest. Whereas before, the cold wind caused the most intense agony and you longed for a good crackling fire to warm your bottom against, now the cold breeze from the open window feels good against your face.
You feel a momentary flash of joy...
How It All Began
In mankind's distant past, our physical needs were mostly all we took care of. Food, water, shelter, sex, warmth - that was what it was all about.
Fast forward one million years and many of us have cracked the 'physical needs' thing. Douglas Adams described the three stages of man's evolution as "How shall we eat?" "What shall we eat?" and "Where shall we do lunch?" Well, we're at the 'doing lunch' stage now, at least in the Western world. For the main part we are all more than adequately fed, watered and housed. Actually, this is a gross understatement - we luxuriate in a massive surplus of these things.
But we are far more than a collection of physical needs. We also have a whole range of intellectual and emotional needs. We also have 'spiritual' needs in the sense of wanting answers to "what's it all about?" questions and wanting to make sense of our life as a whole and attain meaning.
Let's call these our ‘higher' needs.
Higher Needs
Examples of 'higher level' needs include our need for love, meaning, contribution, efficacy, beauty, order, companionship, excitement, respect, authenticity, choice, trust, harmony -- the list is a very long one (at least two dozen needs).
Which Are More Important?
The temptation here is to class these 'higher level' needs as less important than the lower level. In just one way, they are.
Non-fulfilment of lower level needs often leads to death - the actual extinction of the organism. Not filling higher level needs rarely has this effect. But there, the difference ends.
The purpose of life is not brute survival at any cost. The purpose is to survive as a man or woman, with all that this implies. To both surive and to thrive. Thriving requires that your higher level needs are also met. If they are not met, the result will be misery, defeat, low self esteem and low energy.
If too many of your needs are not met for a long period, the result will be depression in all of its guises and possibly even psychosis or suicide. Yes, lack of water will kill the organism called 'man' in a few days; but solitary confinement will kill a man (not the organism but his spirit) in a few months.
Starvation will kill a woman in two weeks; but total lack of love, warmth or affection will kill a woman (not the organism but her spirit) in a few short years.
I do not mean to imply that men and women have a different set of needs. They do not. All humans share an identical set of needs.
The Cyclical Nature of Needs
Our higher level needs are also cyclical. One example should suffice.
We have a need for companionship - we are social creatures by nature. This implies that our need for companionship is not optional. If we do not fill this need we start to feel pain. So imagine now being in solitary confinement (enforced or accidental).
After two or three days you feel discomfort. As the days of solitude accrue, you feel more intense pain - the pain of deep loneliness and the strong desire to see another human face or hear a voice.
If this continues indefinitely, the result is depression and even suicide. Can you possibly imagine that you might say: "Leave me alone! I want to be by myself! I need my space!"? No, this seems inconceivable. But let us see...
Suppose after months of confinement, you receive a visitor. What intense joy! What rapture! You cling on to the person, greedily devouring every line and wrinkle in their face; sucking up their words like a parched traveler in a desert.
Too Much of a Good Thing?
Now I want you to imagine a second visitor and a third - all friends and much loved family. Such happiness! You greet them all warmly. Now a fourth and a fifth; soon fifty well-wishers and friends are crowded into your room.
Hours pass, you start to feel weary. So many people, so much talk. You start to long for some peace and quiet. But your guests have no intention of going. They stay and stay - for hours, then days. They crowd your bedroom whist you sleep, lovingly watching over you. They crowd your living room whilst you are awake, cuddling you, kissing you, touching you - saying nice things.
Gradually it becomes unbearable. You long for solitude. Your need for companionship has been sated and your need for space and quiet is now urgent. You scream out in pain: "Please! Will you all just GO AWAY! I want to be alone! I need space!"
To dark mutterings of “Well! Of all the ungrateful...” they stalk off into the night, leaving you with that which you most need at present... solitude.
And so it goes on, round and round. You could call this a 'cycle of needs.'
I like to imagine this as one of the those Hi Fi volume meters made up of moving illuminated bars (like a bar chart).
Each bar represents a need, the current level of the bar indicating the intensity of that need at any one moment. They never stand still. They dance up and down as each need is either met, or comes to the foreground demanding to be met.
The further below the mid line a bar drops, the more pain you feel. This triggers you into action to get that need met and hopefully the bar comes up to midway - the object is to keep it there.
If it goes above midway, you have overfilled that need (too much food, too much warmth, too much companionship); this also causes pain and triggers you to further action.
[Aside: Can you have too much of seemingly positive things like love or harmony? Sure you can! Imagine a cloying, overbearing lover who will not leave your side for one second and who strums lutes below your lighted window each night - or a 100% harmonious world with never an argument, never a disagreement, everything always being perfect.]
You could say that everything you do in life is a strategy for keeping those bars all in a line, in the middle. Often our strategies are misguided and even counterproductive, but still the intention is to fill a need.
No Final Result
Of course this is a dynamic thing, like juggling. It is never static.
There is never a time - not once in your entire life - where you can sit back and admire your straight line of bars, secure in the knowledge that they will remain that way for longer than a few moments.
A juggler can never relax her concentration and have the balls remain in a perfect arc above her head. And here's the really important bit: even when those bars are in a line, it does not produce joy or ecstatic happiness. These, as we have seen, are our brief reward for starting to fill an urgent, chronic need.
So what do you think is the emotion corresponding to a full set of well-filled needs?
Contentment.
Now we are getting closer to a sustainable and desirable state to aim for.
Everyone thinks they want to be blissfully happy, (in this particular article I am using this word in the sense of intense happiness bordering on joy.) In fact, this is unsustainable by any means - just as the fly trap cannot munch its way through an endless queue of suicidal bluebottles. It is not in the nature of the plant to do this. It is not in our nature to feel constant joy.
This is such an important point that I want you to be very clear about it. As an organism, it is not the case that our purpose is to move towards a state of permanent intense happiness (joy), any more than the juggler aims to attain a perfect frozen arc of equally-spaced balls above her head so that she might relax, arms folded.
So what is our purpose?
It is to maintain a state of dynamic equilibrium - neither too hot, nor too cold; neither too tired, nor over-rested; neither starving, nor bloated.
To achieve this, evolution has provided us with two important feelings: pain and pleasure. Pain is the stick, goading us away from danger, chronic lack, or massive excess. Pleasure is the carrot, enticing us to act in a way that gets it just right - perfectly balanced. Both have the purpose of getting us to act - to do something to restore equilibrium.
Once equilibrium has been achieved, the feeling is not one of intense, prolonged happiness (that is our reward for starting to fill a much neglected need.) The result is equilibrium for the organism and we experience this as a quality of contentment.
Become a Master Juggler of Life
If we become a master juggler of life and get the hang of keeping those tricky bars all in a row, or balls in the air, our reward is deep and lasting contentment.
Since words have many meanings, let me be a little more specific about this state. You feel that all is right with your world (which, of course, it is). You feel calm, in flow, certain, in focus, open, poised, sensitive and clear.
Other people will feel a very special quality about you and want to be close to it - they crave it too, just as every human being does. Life seems easy for you. You wonder why on earth you struggled and strained for so many years, wracked by guilt, angst, pain and unhappiness.
The reason is that you were not, at that point, a master of life.
To push the juggler analogy a teensy bit further; top jugglers like Brad Byers spend years learning exactly how to keep all of those balls or clubs flying in an arc above his head. I imagine that at times it seemed impossible; he felt like giving up. He was probably often frustrated, angry and despairing about ever being able to do such a difficult thing. But having mastered it, the process now is almost effortless for him. When juggling, he is in a 'flow' state - not struggling, sweating and striving to maintain the arc, but calm, certain, almost in a meditative state.
Happiness Is Not Natural
Is contentment the 'natural' human state?
Well, that depends on what you mean by 'natural.' Our default condition is not one of contentment.
It is entirely incorrect to say that if you do nothing, let go or drop out then you will default to a 'natural' state of contentment. The exact opposite is true, in fact.
If you seek contentment you are required to engage in a constant, relentless struggle with nature and reality (required by your essential nature, that is).
Disengaging with this struggle, as you might expect, rapidly produces discontentment closely followed by unhappiness, pain and then death. All the balls come tumbling to the ground and the audience holds it breath, wondering if this is a joke or whether they are witnessing a disaster.
Books, courses and religions which claim that man's 'natural' state is one of happiness are just plain wrong - as wrong as a book on juggling which claims that the balls 'naturally' want to be in a neat arc and that your task as a juggler is to 'get in touch' with this natural state and 'release' the balls to 'do their own thing'...
Mankind's 'natural' state is one of constant struggle to maintain equilibrium. His reward for this, if he masters it, is contentment.
Does all this talk about 'constant struggle' put you off? Perhaps you are thinking that happiness and even contentment are now well out of your reach?
Not so.
Just because you are engaged in a lifelong 'dance' with nature, does not mean that it is arduous, deeply painful and harsh - although it can be these things if you get it wrong. The truth is that it is possible to be content because our needs are not that difficult to meet, particularly these days. Not easy, but not that hard either.
The reason we feel such discontent, pain, unhappiness and angst is mainly because of false information leading to erroneous and completely incorrect strategies for filling our needs.
How to Become A Master of Life
I want to summarise the important things I have been explaining to you:
1. You have many needs, both 'lower level' (e.g. food) and 'higher level' (e.g. love).
2. Your needs are the 'voice' of the organism called a 'human being' telling you what it needs for survival as a human (not survival at any level, e.g. as a cringing, naked half-starved beast.)
3. Your needs are never filled, finally, for all time. They are cyclical. Your two dozen (or so) needs cycle round and around. At any one moment, several are urgently screaming at you, a few are muttering for attention and others are satisfied - for now.
4. When a need is not filled, you feel discomfort and then pain. This is the human organism's method of alerting the higher part of your mind (the strategy part) to come up with some plans, pronto, for filling that need.
5. If a need has been unfilled for a long time, when you attend to it you feel a burst of an emotion we call 'joy.' This is your instant reward for getting started. It is not a sustainable feeling.
6. Gradually, as you master how to juggle your needs and respond to them in a timely fashion, your reward is a feeling we call 'contentment.'
7. The trick is to become a 'master of life' - a master juggler. This is not a 'natural' state. You need to work at it and practice it. You also need an instructor. (If you have ever tried your hand at juggling, you will know it is impossible to learn, by yourself, from first principles. But if someone shows you the step-by-step method, then anyone can learn to juggle three balls in around five hours. Five balls? Come back in five years!)
In case you have not yet realised this fact, it is going to take time for you to become a ‘master of life'.
A good time to start is... now.
Misconceptions about Subliminal Messaging
Misconceptions about Subliminal Messaging
Source: SubliminalMP3s.com
1. It is instant: One of main ways subliminal messaging is portrayed is as an instant fix. This, sadly, is not the case. While there will be a few lucky people who experience a benefit very soon after listening, they are in the minority. Subliminal messaging works better in the longer term, when the messages really start to build in your mind. Generally early experiences may range from you feeling more energized and focused to experiencing a clarity of mind and a burst of motivation.
However, in the longer term you should experience a larger shift in your perception and beliefs and a solid, lasting change in your
behavior.
Of course it also depends on the type of album you are using. If it is a personal development type of album addressing a deep personal issue then it will likely be a gradual change. Albums with more instant results are ones such as albums in our relaxation range, and even our positive attitude album - these albums are meant to focus you straight away and give you a boost there and then - i.e. help you to relax, or help you to think more
positive.
2. You lose control: Some people are worried that they will lose control, or could even be made to do things against their will. Nothing could be further from the truth. Unlike traditional hypnosis for example you will stay conscious and in full control throughout the experience.
You can never be made to do something you don't want to do. You actually keep full control at all times - i.e. if you do not fully want the change and are not focusing on it happening then it won't. We give the disclaimer that you should not use the albums on other people, but this is mainly a legal requirement as using subliminal messages on other people is deemed to be manipulative - but the truth is that if you do not want the change, or you don't want to do something then you can't be made to do it. It will only ever help, or give you a boost towards goals you do want to achieve.
3. You enter a trance: Unlike hypnosis you will NOT enter a trance at all. You will
be fully conscious while listening. This means you can listen on the move, while studying, exercising etc - you can fit the album into your day as you prefer. We still recommend not listening while driving however, as even though you will not enter a trance there are suggestions to help you relax and calm your mind.
4. They are illegal: This is an exaggeration. The only instance they are not allowed is within advertising or to manipulate others without their knowledge. For personal use subliminal messages are completely legal. The key is that you have to be aware that subliminal messages are being used and consent to them - but if you are using them on yourself, to overcome problems and help you achieve goals then there is no problem at all.
5. They are dangerous: Although it is true that they are banned from within
advertising due to the potential to manipulate people against their will, the label of them being "dangerous" is irrelevant when positive messages are used for personal use. You will never be in any danger from our albums, they will only ever produce a positive result.
6. The can contain negative messages: In relation to the point above, all of our
albums only contain positive statements. We have strict quality control over the messages we use. You can also read every message we use on each album page to make sure they are a good fit for you. Some people are still skeptical, wondering "perhaps they contain messages like 'buy more subliminals' or just 'I love subliminals'?".
We certainly don't do this, and we have never heard of any company doing this to be honest. Even if they were to be used we don't think it would produce the desired effect. If an immoral company did include these types of messages yet the album still did not achieve it's primary purpose then it is unlikely that you would buy more subliminals - you still have control and the ability to think logically that the album didn't work for you.
7. They require no further effort: We've saved this one till last - it is a double
edged sword for us, it is one of the things which attracts people to subliminal messaging, but at the same time it is an exaggeration, and not strictly true.
The bottom line is that if you ONLY use a subliminal album, i.e. without taking any
conscious action or working towards your goal - then you will not get a very positive result. Subliminal albums are simply meant as an aid - a tool to help you reach your goal, but not do it all for you. Subliminal messages work in several ways, but primarily they align your mind to your goals - to make you focused, committed, and more motivated, to make sure you stay on track and go all out to achieve success. If you do not put in this primary level of effort to work towards a change to start with then the subliminal messages will only have a limited effect.
Source: SubliminalMP3s.com
1. It is instant: One of main ways subliminal messaging is portrayed is as an instant fix. This, sadly, is not the case. While there will be a few lucky people who experience a benefit very soon after listening, they are in the minority. Subliminal messaging works better in the longer term, when the messages really start to build in your mind. Generally early experiences may range from you feeling more energized and focused to experiencing a clarity of mind and a burst of motivation.
However, in the longer term you should experience a larger shift in your perception and beliefs and a solid, lasting change in your
behavior.
Of course it also depends on the type of album you are using. If it is a personal development type of album addressing a deep personal issue then it will likely be a gradual change. Albums with more instant results are ones such as albums in our relaxation range, and even our positive attitude album - these albums are meant to focus you straight away and give you a boost there and then - i.e. help you to relax, or help you to think more
positive.
2. You lose control: Some people are worried that they will lose control, or could even be made to do things against their will. Nothing could be further from the truth. Unlike traditional hypnosis for example you will stay conscious and in full control throughout the experience.
You can never be made to do something you don't want to do. You actually keep full control at all times - i.e. if you do not fully want the change and are not focusing on it happening then it won't. We give the disclaimer that you should not use the albums on other people, but this is mainly a legal requirement as using subliminal messages on other people is deemed to be manipulative - but the truth is that if you do not want the change, or you don't want to do something then you can't be made to do it. It will only ever help, or give you a boost towards goals you do want to achieve.
3. You enter a trance: Unlike hypnosis you will NOT enter a trance at all. You will
be fully conscious while listening. This means you can listen on the move, while studying, exercising etc - you can fit the album into your day as you prefer. We still recommend not listening while driving however, as even though you will not enter a trance there are suggestions to help you relax and calm your mind.
4. They are illegal: This is an exaggeration. The only instance they are not allowed is within advertising or to manipulate others without their knowledge. For personal use subliminal messages are completely legal. The key is that you have to be aware that subliminal messages are being used and consent to them - but if you are using them on yourself, to overcome problems and help you achieve goals then there is no problem at all.
5. They are dangerous: Although it is true that they are banned from within
advertising due to the potential to manipulate people against their will, the label of them being "dangerous" is irrelevant when positive messages are used for personal use. You will never be in any danger from our albums, they will only ever produce a positive result.
6. The can contain negative messages: In relation to the point above, all of our
albums only contain positive statements. We have strict quality control over the messages we use. You can also read every message we use on each album page to make sure they are a good fit for you. Some people are still skeptical, wondering "perhaps they contain messages like 'buy more subliminals' or just 'I love subliminals'?".
We certainly don't do this, and we have never heard of any company doing this to be honest. Even if they were to be used we don't think it would produce the desired effect. If an immoral company did include these types of messages yet the album still did not achieve it's primary purpose then it is unlikely that you would buy more subliminals - you still have control and the ability to think logically that the album didn't work for you.
7. They require no further effort: We've saved this one till last - it is a double
edged sword for us, it is one of the things which attracts people to subliminal messaging, but at the same time it is an exaggeration, and not strictly true.
The bottom line is that if you ONLY use a subliminal album, i.e. without taking any
conscious action or working towards your goal - then you will not get a very positive result. Subliminal albums are simply meant as an aid - a tool to help you reach your goal, but not do it all for you. Subliminal messages work in several ways, but primarily they align your mind to your goals - to make you focused, committed, and more motivated, to make sure you stay on track and go all out to achieve success. If you do not put in this primary level of effort to work towards a change to start with then the subliminal messages will only have a limited effect.
Supply Side Home Economics
Supply Side Home Economics
I’m tired of everyone telling us how to save money. What we need is people telling us how to make money.
Like a lot of people today, maybe your budget is tight. Maybe you read Money Magazine looking for a few tips to get ahead. Or maybe you read Get Rich Slowly (one of my favorite blogs). Most money sources have oodles of tips on how to save money and make your fixed budget go further.
Common Tips About Money:
■Cutting coupons
■Eat out less
■Quit buying books and use the public library
■Bring a bag lunch to work
■Shop at the Salvation Army and the Goodwill
■Buy in bulk at a warehouse club
■Refinance your home
■Send away for rebates
■Get DVDs from Redbox
■Use 0% credit card offers
■Increase your insurance deductible
■Keep your used car
■Limit gift giving
■Take advantage of matching 401k funds
■Drink less alcohol
■Stop Smoking
■Avoid late payments
■Replace light bulbs
■Buy energy efficient appliances
I’m sure you’ve read dozens more. These are great ideas, but… they won’t solve most people’s money problems. They’re too minuscule. Too incremental. They’re a good start at getting your debt under control, or dealing with a lost job, but in the long run, they won’t get you were you want to be. They are temporary fixes to a lifetime issue.
We all want more money for one reason… It gives us freedom to pursue our goals, to travel, to grow, and to create the life of our dreams.
If you focus all your attention and energy on saving money, you aren’t focusing on the solution. You are focusing on the problem. The solution is creating wealth. To create wealth, you need income and you need to grow it. So if you’re focused on coupons and light bulbs you aren’t focused on the long term. You’re focused on a band-aid fix.
What is Supply Side Home Economics?
In 1997, Christine and I decided we would focus 80% of our money consciousness on the supply side. That means – we focused on creating more income for our family – the supply side of money. That doesn’t mean we don’t negotiate. We recently reduced our phone service by $30 per month. We also cut our cable and internet bill by almost $500 a year without compromising service. Focusing on Supply Side Home Economics means spending 80% of your energy on generating income.
Think about it…
If you make $50,000 per year and you spend $50,000 per year, you’re broke. But if you increase your income to $70,000 and you don’t change a thing, you’re solving your money problem. The bigger problem is… too many people spend everything they make no matter how much, but that’s another blog post…
How to start?
Look for opportunity everywhere. Instead of spending an afternoon chasing down a 50 cent discount on milk, work on a business. Sell stuff on craigslist. Sell stuff on ebay. Create new internet sites. Look for ways to help other people get what they want.
As noble as conservation and frugality is, it doesn’t create economic growth. Hunkering down and not spending will not get the economy out of this slump. Creating wealth will. Likewise, hunkering down will not get you or your family on the path to prosperity. Focusing on growth will.
With the technology available today, at near zero cost, there is no reason why you or anyone else can’t create $500 – $1000 in new income in your spare time.
How do you get there?
Ask yourself a few questions:
■What do you have around the house you can sell?
■What unique knowledge and life experience do you have?
■How can you offer that knowledge and experience to others?
■What value can you provide others?
■How can you give them more value than you charge for your goods or services?
■How can you help others sell their stuff?
■How can you teach others your unique skills and knowledge?
■How can you gain valuable specialized knowledge?
■What makes you unique and how can you offer that to others?
Economic Fact:
When you create more wealth for yourself, it makes us all wealthier. It isn’t zero sum. The pie grows for everyone. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. So help humanity by making yourself wealthier. Here’s a great place to start (don’t let the hyped up title throw you off, it’s great).
Steve-olson.com
I’m tired of everyone telling us how to save money. What we need is people telling us how to make money.
Like a lot of people today, maybe your budget is tight. Maybe you read Money Magazine looking for a few tips to get ahead. Or maybe you read Get Rich Slowly (one of my favorite blogs). Most money sources have oodles of tips on how to save money and make your fixed budget go further.
Common Tips About Money:
■Cutting coupons
■Eat out less
■Quit buying books and use the public library
■Bring a bag lunch to work
■Shop at the Salvation Army and the Goodwill
■Buy in bulk at a warehouse club
■Refinance your home
■Send away for rebates
■Get DVDs from Redbox
■Use 0% credit card offers
■Increase your insurance deductible
■Keep your used car
■Limit gift giving
■Take advantage of matching 401k funds
■Drink less alcohol
■Stop Smoking
■Avoid late payments
■Replace light bulbs
■Buy energy efficient appliances
I’m sure you’ve read dozens more. These are great ideas, but… they won’t solve most people’s money problems. They’re too minuscule. Too incremental. They’re a good start at getting your debt under control, or dealing with a lost job, but in the long run, they won’t get you were you want to be. They are temporary fixes to a lifetime issue.
We all want more money for one reason… It gives us freedom to pursue our goals, to travel, to grow, and to create the life of our dreams.
If you focus all your attention and energy on saving money, you aren’t focusing on the solution. You are focusing on the problem. The solution is creating wealth. To create wealth, you need income and you need to grow it. So if you’re focused on coupons and light bulbs you aren’t focused on the long term. You’re focused on a band-aid fix.
What is Supply Side Home Economics?
In 1997, Christine and I decided we would focus 80% of our money consciousness on the supply side. That means – we focused on creating more income for our family – the supply side of money. That doesn’t mean we don’t negotiate. We recently reduced our phone service by $30 per month. We also cut our cable and internet bill by almost $500 a year without compromising service. Focusing on Supply Side Home Economics means spending 80% of your energy on generating income.
Think about it…
If you make $50,000 per year and you spend $50,000 per year, you’re broke. But if you increase your income to $70,000 and you don’t change a thing, you’re solving your money problem. The bigger problem is… too many people spend everything they make no matter how much, but that’s another blog post…
How to start?
Look for opportunity everywhere. Instead of spending an afternoon chasing down a 50 cent discount on milk, work on a business. Sell stuff on craigslist. Sell stuff on ebay. Create new internet sites. Look for ways to help other people get what they want.
As noble as conservation and frugality is, it doesn’t create economic growth. Hunkering down and not spending will not get the economy out of this slump. Creating wealth will. Likewise, hunkering down will not get you or your family on the path to prosperity. Focusing on growth will.
With the technology available today, at near zero cost, there is no reason why you or anyone else can’t create $500 – $1000 in new income in your spare time.
How do you get there?
Ask yourself a few questions:
■What do you have around the house you can sell?
■What unique knowledge and life experience do you have?
■How can you offer that knowledge and experience to others?
■What value can you provide others?
■How can you give them more value than you charge for your goods or services?
■How can you help others sell their stuff?
■How can you teach others your unique skills and knowledge?
■How can you gain valuable specialized knowledge?
■What makes you unique and how can you offer that to others?
Economic Fact:
When you create more wealth for yourself, it makes us all wealthier. It isn’t zero sum. The pie grows for everyone. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. So help humanity by making yourself wealthier. Here’s a great place to start (don’t let the hyped up title throw you off, it’s great).
Steve-olson.com
Monday, April 26, 2010
10 Tips for Successful Business Networking
1. Keep in mind that networking is about being genuine and authentic, building trust and relationships, and seeing how you can help others.
2. Ask yourself what your goals are in participating in networking meetings so that you will pick groups that will help you get what you are looking for. Some meetings are based more on learning, making contacts, and/or volunteering rather than on strictly making business connections.
3. Visit as many groups as possible that spark your interest. Notice the tone and attitude of the group. Do the people sound supportive of one another? Does the leadership appear competent? Many groups will allow you to visit two times before joining.
4. Hold volunteer positions in organizations. This is a great way to stay visible and give back to groups that have helped you.
5. Ask open-ended questions in networking conversations. This means questions that ask who, what, where, when, and how as opposed to those that can be answered with a simple yes or no. This form of questioning opens up the discussion and shows listeners that you are interested in them.
6. Become known as a powerful resource for others. When you are known as a strong resource, people remember to turn to you for suggestions, ideas, names of other people, etc. This keeps you visible to them.
7. Have a clear understanding of what you do and why, for whom, and what makes your doing it special or different from others doing the same thing. In order to get referrals, you must first have a clear understanding of what you do that you can easily articulate to others.
8. Be able to articulate what you are looking for and how others may help you. Too often people in conversations ask, "How may I help you?" and no immediate answer comes to mind.
9. Follow through quickly and efficiently on referrals you are given. When people give you referrals, your actions are a reflection on them. Respect and honor that and your referrals will grow.
10. Call those you meet who may benefit from what you do and vice versa. Express that you enjoyed meeting them, and ask if you could get together and share ideas.
When Business Cards Aren't Enough:
7 Unusual, Uncommon and Unexpected
Networking Secrets to Help Boost Business
There comes a time in every small businessperson’s life when common networking practices like handing out business cards, attending various meetings and schmoozing with potential clients only goes so far. Eventually, the same old techniques get overused to the point that they become insufficient.
But how many times have you gained new business, created a great relationship or watched your website hits skyrocket because you did something unusual? Or uncommon? Perhaps even unexpected? Maybe you were on the right track.
The following is a list of atypical networking techniques that will help boost business. WARNING: They will stretch your courage. They will test your expertise. And they will challenge your creativity. But when business cards aren’t enough, alternative ways to develop and maintain mutually valuable relationships are your ticket to networking success.
What’s Your Story?
How did you get your start in business? Did you “fall” into your line of work? Perhaps there was an interesting anecdote, epiphany or event that caused the birth of your business. If so, this is called “Your Story.” Now, it’s not your Elevator Speech or your 30 Second Commercial. It’s your story. And it’s a fundamental tool for helping people and potential customers get to know you.
Here’s the key: write it out. Practice saying it aloud. Make it funny. And tell it to everybody. Not only does this create a memorable presence, but the more you share it with people, the more they will share Your Story with other people. Why? Because people don’t remember things, they remember stories. And after a while, the word about Your Story will spread.
Mix the Medium and Wow People
When I receive an email from an organization or business who has a question, wants to work together or just wants to chat, I do something called Mix the Medium. Here's how it works:
1) The exact moment I finish reading the email, I obtain the person’s phone number (if I don’t already have it.) If there's no email signature, I look at their email address or go to their website. If all I know is their company, I call Directory Assistance or look them up on City Search. Basically, I do anything I can to get their phone number within the next two minutes.
2) Then I call them right back.
3) I then say, "Hi, this is Scott Ginsberg. I was in the office when your email came through and I thought I’d call you back!" I say with a big smile on my face.
PEOPLE LOVE THIS. I have never done this without completely blowing the caller away. They respond with such excited phrases as "Wow, that was fast!" or "I'm impressed you called back already!" In fact, I recently received an email from a friend of mine who just changed jobs. He was writing to say hello and wish me a Happy New Year. And since I hadn’t heard from Jake in quite a while, I Mixed the Medium and called him right back. Five minutes later he booked me to do one of my speaking programs for his new organization!
Network en Masse
Speaking of speaking, here’s another untapped networking resource: local groups, organizations and associations. But I’m not talking about joining; I’m talking about giving a speech. It’s what I call “Networking en Masse.”
Small businesspeople are successful because they’re experts on something. So whether you’re in sales, printing, tech consulting or retail, find a way to transform your expertise into an informative, concise and entertaining speech that will help other people like yourself boost business.
Contact the meeting coordinator of your local Chamber, Rotary Club, Networking Group or Trade Association. They always need speakers. Offer the group a free 15-20 minute program. Include valuable tips, stories, illustrations and examples from your own business experiences that are of interest to the members. By speaking, you position yourself as an expert, validate your credibility and increase your company’s visibility.
Write as an Expert
Another underused networking tactic is writing articles or tip sheets about hot topics in your industry. You don’t even have to be a freelance writer or a journalist – just a business professional who can effectively convey his or her expertise in the form of a short article. Similar to speaking, writing articles in a publication read by your target market is the perfect way to position you and your company.
Here’s how to get started with this tip: Go to Google, type in your topic of expertise and the word “article.” For example, if you work in phone book advertising, type in “phone book advertising article.” (Be sure to use the quotation marks.) Hundreds of hits will come up. Read through a few dozen of them. This will give you an idea of what hot topics other people in your industry are writing articles about. Then, find out which online databases, ezines, newsletters or websites syndicated the articles you just read. By localizing these sources, you can contact the editors and inquire about article submission guidelines. (And if you get the opportunity to publish articles online, you can easily email the article link to other people who would benefit from reading your work.)
Don’t Fear the Big Shots
You’d be surprised how approachable some of the so-called “Big Shots” are. Great example: At a National Speakers Association Convention in July of 2004, I had the pleasure of attending a session with Seth Godin, best selling author of Unleashing the Ideavirus and Purple Cow. Now, in addition hearing him speak, I’ve also been a frequent reader of his books and articles for years. And a few months after seeing him live I thought, “What the heck…maybe I’ll just drop him an email.”
So it came to pass on October 8th, 2004, that I emailed Seth Godin. I told him how much I enjoyed his speech at the convention and that his work was a big influence on my own books and speeches. I also told him to check out my website, www.hellomynameisscott.com, for it was an example of the kind of idea he so passionately supported.
What did I have to lose, right?
To my surprise about a half hour later, he wrote me back. “Thanks for the kind words, Scott! I blogged your site. Good luck.”
Little did I realize that Seth Godin publishes one of the top ten most frequently read blogs in the world. As a result, I received over 70,000 hits on my website in one day! This resulted in some great new contacts, several exciting business opportunities and the birth of my own blog, which is now a critical part of my business! Which brings me to my last networking tip.
Blog For Bucks
If you don’t already have a blog for your business – get one. A blog is an online journal on which you can post comments, links, stories and articles. This popular new medium through which to share your feelings, experiences and emotions is a free and fun way to network with other online professionals. After I talked with Seth last year, I started the blog for my business, and it’s become a valuable tool to stimulate personal dialogue with potential customers. It’s also a great way to let your customers know what’s going on in your life.
For more information go to www.blogger.com; or do a search for any of the various blog providers.
The commonality of these unusual, uncommon and unexpected networking techniques is this: you must do what nobody else is willing to do. Sure, handing out business cards and attending meetings are all good techniques. But everyone does that. So are you willing to practice telling Your Story? Would you call people right back when they’re expecting you to email them tomorrow? Do you have the courage to give a great speech, write a helpful article or start a blog that shares your expertise? And are you willing to get in contact with a Big Shot?
I hope so – because eventually, business cards just aren’t enough!
Catch More Clients Using Strategic Networking
Is networking helping you bring in the new clients you want?
If you are like most independent professionals and small business owners, you put hard work into getting your name out there and distribute your business card wherever you go. You may even attend a weekly or monthly networking group or occasional business conference where people share leads. And like most people, your time and effort isn’t generating a steady stream of new business.
The problem is that most people think that networking consists of telling as many people as possible what they do, and handing out as many business cards as they can. They waste the few precious moments they have with new and existing contacts by focusing on themselves.
Its possible to meet someone in the airport, hand them your card after a brief conversation, and have them call you to request your services, but this random approach is like playing the lottery. You can’t count on it to produce results. It is a Push and Pray technique: you push your information out to others and pray that they respond.
It rarely works. Your contact loses your card or simply forgets about you, or the timing wasn’t right, or, in spite of the connection you thought you’d made, a single conversation usually isn’t enough to launch a client relationship.
That initial conversation should be about understanding your prospects’ problems, needs and concerns, and collecting their contact information. The objective of networking is not to expound on your credentials.
Spend the time you have with prospects (or people who might know a prospect) asking questions and collecting information. Then you can determine whether they would have any genuine interest in/need for the solutions you provide. Use this client problem centered networking strategy to initiate and build profitable relationships.
Pull Information
1. See how many cards you can collect from prospects, and
don’t worry about how many of your own business cards you distribute. Some successful marketers don’t even have a business card.
2. When you meet people, use the time to gather information from them, including:
• Primary concerns about their business
• Problems they want solved
• Unmet business needs
• Areas where the solutions you provide overlap with their needs
• Their contact information
3. Continue to expand your network. Whenever you make a contact, ask for referrals to other prospects.
4. Once you have this information, enter it into your
database or contact manager.
Build Relationships
1. People have short memories. Follow-up after your initial contact and then stay in touch with your network on a regular basis. If you let more than a month go by without making contact they’ll forget that you exist and that you are the best person to solve their financial, legal, human resource, design, or other problems.
You’ll want to make personal contact with some people on your prospect list, but in most cases, a letter, newsletter or ezine will do the job. Use the merge function in your software to personalize your mailings.
2. Demonstrate the value of your expertise or products by sending prospects and clients an idea or suggestion they can use right away. You could present this in an article you’ve written, or one you’ve read. Your contact will then associate you with the problems you solve.
Pull information from prospects and clients to grow your network, stay in touch and regularly demonstrate the value of your products and services.
Networking should be one of the core marketing tactics of most independent professionals and small business owners. Use client-centered networking to lessen your reliance on costly and time consuming cold calling/telemarketing and advertising. Over time, this business building strategy will reward you with a steady stream of new clients.
Top 10 Ways to Maximize Your Networking Approachability
After reading and researching thousands of books, articles and other resources on communication, first impressions, networking and conversation, I’ve learned one thing: none of them address what approachability means. Or maybe they just don’t take the time to define it, stress its importance and offer suggestions on how to maximize it.
That research was my impetus for writing The Power of Approachability. I wanted to give people a clear picture of what the idea meant, along with many small tips and suggestions to put that idea to use – one conversation at a time.
So, straight from the pages of the book, here are my Top Ten Ways to Maximize Your Networking Approachability.
Ready to Engage
The word approachability derives from the Latin verb appropriare, which means “to come nearer to.” Interesting. It doesn’t say anything about the approach-er or the approach-ee. Just “to come nearer to.” So the first idea to remember is that approachability is a two way street. It’s both you stepping onto someone else’s front porch; and you inviting someone to step onto your front porch.
Although this article will address both sides of the street, here’s an example of the former. When you arrive at a meeting, event, party or anywhere in which many conversations will take place, prepare yourself. Be “ready to engage” with conversation topics, questions and stories in the back of your mind ready to go as soon as you meet someone. This will help you avoid those awkward “How’s the weather” type of discussions.
CPI
This acronym stands for the Common Point of Interest. It’s an essential element to every conversation and interaction. Your duty, as you meet new people, or even as you talk with those you already know, is to discover the CPI as soon as possible. It connects people to you. It allows them to feel more comfortable talking to you. And it increases your approachability inasmuch as people will be magnetized to you due to the commonality you share.
A great tip is to ask the right type of questions. Similar to our first example, “ready to engage,” you don’t want to ask people about the weather. You can do better than that! Instead, ask questions that begin with “What’s your favorite…” “Tell me the best…” or “When was the last time…” The CPI is almost guaranteed to be discovered.
Flavored Answers
In the event that one of those Fruitless Questions like “How’s it going?” “What’s up?” or “How are you?” comes up, don’t fall into the F.I.N.E. trap. In fact, fine isn’t even a word. No, seriously! I looked the word up in 23 different dictionaries and it wasn’t listed! Upon further research I discovered that F.I.N.E. is an acronym for “Feelings I’m Not Expressing.”
A great technique is to offer a Flavored Answer to a Fruitless Question. Instead of “fine,” try “Amazing!” “Any better and I’d be twins!” or “Everything is beautiful.” Your conversation partner will instantly change his or her demeanor as they smile and, most of the time, inquirer further to find out what made you say that answer. Because nobody expects it. And offering a true response to magnify the way you feel is a perfect way to share yourself with others, or “make yourself personally available” to others.
Don’t Cross Your Arms
Even if it’s cold, even if you’re bored, even if you’re tired and don’t want to be there – don’t cross your arms. It’s such a simple, subconscious non-verbal cue that too many people practice and it hinders their approachability.
As a result, people won’t want to “bother” you. They will form the impression that you are defensive, nervous, judgmental, close minded or skeptical. Honestly, would you want to approach someone like that? I know I wouldn’t.
Don’t Assume
Every time you assume, you end up making an … yeah, yeah, yeah – we get it. Or do we? How many times have we uttered one of the following sentences, only to be stricken with a terrible case of Foot-In-Mouth Disease?
• You must be new here?
• How’s work going?
• Do you remember me?
Remember, just because someone walks in whom you’ve never seen before – doesn’t mean he’s new. Or just because you’re at a networking meeting – doesn’t mean everyone in attendance has a job. And believe me, not everyone you remember – remembers you.
Approachability is a function of comfort, so it’s important to sidestep these moments of embarrassment with Success Sentences. These are phrases that allow the other person to offer you’re the information you need to know. Examples include, “I’m not sure we’ve met before,” “What are you working on this week?” and “I’m Scott, we met last month at the Chamber meeting.”
Options for Communication
Your friends, colleagues, customers and coworkers will choose to communicate with you in different ways. Some will choose face to face, some will email, others will call, while others will do a little of everything. The bottom line is: make all of them available. On your business cards, email signatures, websites or marketing materials, let people know that can get in touch with you in whatever manner they choose. Sure, you might prefer email. But what matters most is the comfort of the other person and their ability to communicate effectively.
A good idea is to give people as many options to contact you as possible. There’s nothing more annoying to a “phone person” than when she discovers she can’t get a hold of you unless she emails you.
Email Signature
Whatever program you use for email - Outlook, Eudora, Yahoo, Hotmail - find out how to customize your signature. There's nothing more frustrating than receiving an email from someone who wants to talk further, get together or have you send them something that doesn't have any personal information in the email. So at the end of every email you send, always cross reference the following information:
• Name
• Title
• Company/Organization
• Mailing address
• At least two phone numbers
• Fax number
• Email address
• Website
• A sentence or two about yourself, your company or your job
Think of it this way: have you ever received a handwritten letter from someone that had no return address stamped on the envelope?
Always Have Business Cards
Have you ever told a story about a successful, serendipitous business encounter that ended with the phrase, “Thank God I had one of my business cards with me that day!”? If so, great! You’re practicing approachability by being “easy to reach.”
If not, you’ve no doubt missed out on valuable relationships and opportunities. And it happens – people forget cards, get their supply reprinted or change jobs. But the bottom line is; there is a time and place for networking: ANY time and ANY place. Because you just never know whom you might meet.
No Fear
They won’t say hello back to me. They won’t be interested in me. I will make a fool of myself. This is the number one reason people don’t start conversations. However, practice will make this fear fade away. The more often you you start conversations, the better you will become at it. So, be the first to introduce yourself or say hello. When you take an active instead of a passive role, your skills will develop and there will be less of a chance for rejection. Also understand the gains vs. losses. For example, what’s so bad about a rejection from someone you don’t even know?
Wear Your Nametag
I’ve heard every possible complaint about wearing nametags, and all of them can be validated. Case in point:
• Nametags look silly – yes, they do. But remember, everyone else is wearing them too.
• Nametags ruin my clothes – not if you wear them on the edge of your lapel or use cloth-safe connectors like lanyards and plastic clips.
• But I already know everybody – no you don’t. You may think you do, but new people come in and out of businesses and organizations all the time.
• But everyone already knows me – no they don’t. Even the best networkers know there’s always someone new to meet.
Your nametag is your best friend for several reasons. First of all, a person’s name is the single context of human memory most forgotten. And people are less likely to approach you if they don’t know (or forgot) your name. Secondly, it’s free advertising for you and your company. Third, nametags encourage people to be friendly and more approachable. TRUST me on that one!
Gain Control of Your Marketing Efforts and Assure a Steady Flow of Clients
When it comes to marketing, do you ever feel like you are at the mercy of the tides – following up on a referral here, chasing a lead there and more often than not ending up battered and bruised by the rocks along the shoreline? There is a simple solution. It is a solution that will put you in control of your marketing efforts and help assure a steady flow of prospective clients: develop and use a contact management database.
Now what could be simpler? And if you invest in developing your database, like an investment in a great stock or mutual fund, your return will be many times the initial investment. As with most things knowing what needs to be done is simple. Actually doing them or doing them successfully is a little bit more complicated. That is why so many of us have contact management databases like ACT! or Goldmine installed on our computers with nary a name entered in while we continue to be tossed about helplessly like a seashell in the marketing tide.
Gain control of your marketing efforts now!
Set-up a contact management database – Pick a program – ACT! and Goldmine are popular contact management databases. Outlook may even work if you’re just getting started. And coaches should definitely explore Client Compass, a customized business management software including a client and prospect database, developed for coaches by coaches. Talk to other people in your line of business to see what they are using and what they like and dislike about the program. Give some thought to how you might use the database and what types of information you want to collect.
Here are some general things to consider as you start this process:
• Have one list. Setting up multiple lists for example one with everyone you met at one networking event, another with names from a second networking event and a third from a mailing list you purchased leads to duplicates that at best needlessly increases costs and at worst irritates your prospective clients with duplicate mailings. Be especially careful of this when doing mass e-mailing.
• Set-up fields so contacts can be sorted in multiple ways. For example, you would want to include fields for the source of the name; the type of business the individual is in; which of your products/services they are most likely to be interested in; and whether they are a suspect, prospect, potential referral source, current client, past client, etc.
• Determine other purposes for which you may want to use the database. Client Compass for example has a multitude of functions helpful to managing a coaching practice including client and prospect information tracking, coaching call summaries, administration, marketing and invoicing. There's even a credit card billing option. Goldmine can be used to track both opportunities (proposals that you might have out and the status of the proposals) as well as active projects – especially helpful for consulting projects where multiple people may be involved.
• Be sure you can easily use the names for direct mail and e-mail purposes. The database program should have the capability to do merge mailings and e-mails to selected groups or the ability to export to other programs such as Excel so mail merges can be accomplished.
Invest in the technology and the assistance necessary to set-up a functional database system because this is one of the most valuable tools in constructing an effective marketing program.
Feed the database on a regular basis. The best designed database with all the latest technological bells and whistles is useless if it doesn’t have any names in it. The primary objective of much of your promotional efforts should be obtaining contact information for individuals who fit the profile of your target customer. You can then enter this information into your database and begin the relationship development process with these individuals.
So how can you feed your database?
• Networking. When you are networking be sure to ask for the cards of the people you meet who could be prospective customers. In fact, it is much more important to obtain their card than it is to give them your card.
• Speaking. When you speak or do presentations be sure you have a mechanism for obtaining the names of the people in attendance. A door prize is one good way to do this.
• Writing. If you write articles be sure to invite readers to your website to sign-up for your regular newsletter or a free guide.
• Direct mail and advertising. With a few exceptions, the goal of direct mail or advertising should not be to make a sale. It should be to obtain contact information so you can continue to market to those individuals who have shown an interest in your services. Therefore your promotional pieces should be designed to get a maximum number of people with even a slight interest in your services to provide you their contact information. Giving away a free guide is one excellent way to accomplish this.
Obviously once you have contact information it must be entered into the database. The 500 cards you collected through networking activities last year aren’t doing much good wrapped in a rubber band lying in desk drawer. If you get even a few business cards a week that need to be entered into the database it is well worth an investment in a card scanning program such as CardScan. Be sure the program you select allows export of the contact information to the contact database program you will be using. In fact, a program like CardScan could serve as the primary contact management system if you are just getting started. If adding names to your database is something you just never seem to get done the investment in some administrative support to accomplish this task can pay off handsomely.
Consistently nurture the names in the database. A great database with hundreds or even thousands of names in it is useless unless you actually have contact with the names in the database. This is a topic for another article or even a whole book. At a minimum there should be follow-up with every contact shortly after you receive their contact information (i.e. a note or e-mail to someone you met at a networking event within a few days of meeting them) and regular, planned contact with them at least monthly going forward. With today’s technology much of this can be automated.
Protect this valuable asset. Your contact database is one of your most valuable assets. Be sure you protect it. Do regular back-ups and store these back-ups off site. For about the cost of a week’s worth of Starbuck ’s coffee you can have all of your files backed up automatically each night and stored on a remote server. What would be the cost of replacing your contact database?
Get your feet planted solidly in the sand. Invest in developing, maintaining and using a contact management database to harness the power of the marketing tides and generate the leads you need to grow the business of your dreams.
7 Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™
Networking is a term that didn't exist (academically) until almost 40 years ago. It's a word uttered in and around the business world every day, yet is unclear to most as to how it actually works. Still, it's a fundamental tool to the success of any business.
By definition, the term networking is the development and maintenance of mutually valuable relationships. It's not schmoozing; it's not just handing out business cards, selling, marketing or small talk. Those activities are part of networking, but unfortunately, many people's misunderstanding of the term causes them network ineffectively.
The following are The 7 Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™, and they can stand in the in your way of developing mutually valuable relationships. So, next time you attend your Chamber or Association meeting, keep these ideas in mind so you can offer the most value to your fellow networkers.
Habit #1: Attitude Much like the development of any skill, networking begins with attitude. Unfortunately, Highly Horrible Networkers have the wrong attitude. If you've ever attended a networking function before, perhaps you've encountered businesspeople who act in the following ways:
• The hard sell – they believe networking is about one thing and one thing only: selling products and services to everyone in the room.
• Business only – they're not there to make friends. They're not there to have fun. And they're certainly not interested in developing mutually valuable relationships.
• It's all about me – they don't take the time to help and share with others, but rather focus on their own needs. In other words, they can't spell “N-E-T-W-O-R-K-I-N-G” without “I.”
Attitude is fundamental to effective networking. In fact, it's the most important habit to understand.
Habit #2: Dig Your Well WHEN You're Thirsty One of my favorite networking books is called Dig Your Well Before You're Thirsty, by Harvey McKay. It's probably the most well known text on this subject. The key to McKay's work is making your friends, establishing contacts and developing relationships – before you need them. Getting what you want by helping others get what they want first.
Enter the Highly Horrible Networkers, who only network because:
a) They need new customers
b) They have a new product or service to sell
c) Their boss forced them to do so
Take my friend Lawrence, for example. He's quite successful in the insurance business
; however he recently approached me about using networking to obtain some hot leads.
“My numbers are down. My boss is on my back. I gotta get out there and start networking…or else! What do you suggest?”
“Networking takes time,” I explained, “and you can't expect to come into loads of business or dozens of potential clients without developing the relationships first.”
As you already learned, networking is the development and maintenance of mutually valuable relationships…over time. If you try to dig your well WHEN you're thirsty, you may never find a drink.
Habit #3: Dealin' the Deck Habit #3 is a dangerous one, and it happens all the time. Have you ever seen people distribute 173 of their business cards during the first 5 minutes of the event? They move as quickly as possible from one person to the next. They don't make eye contact, they don't ask to exchange cards – they just deal them out.
“Here's my card, call me if you need a designer! See ya later.”
“But…I…never even got your name!” you muse.
This is guaranteed to make people feel puny and insignificant. Notice these Highly Horrible Networkers don't spend time actually meeting and establishing rapport with new people; but rather concentrate on giving out as many cards as possible. It's quantity over quality, right?
Wrong.
Dealin' the Deck is one of the most common networking pet peeves. Whenever I give my program The Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™, I walk out into the audience for a quick demonstration of this habit. I grab a stack of business cards and quickly jump from table to table tossing out dozens of them without as much looking at the audience members I'm handing them to.
Unfortunately during one speech, it backfired.
Literally.
Last year, I was demonstrating Highly Horrible Habit #3 when speaking at a local business meeting. While hopping from table to table as dozens of cards flew through the air and into people's laps and salads, someone yelled out, “Oh my God!”
I stopped dead in my tracks. I looked back at the head table and noticed that one of my cards landed in the centerpiece…
…which was a candle!
MY BUSINESS CARD WAS ON FIRE!!
I threw down the microphone, lunged at the table and snatched the burning business card from the candle! As I toppled over the chair in front of me I yelled something to the effect of “Oh my God!” shook the flames off my half burnt card and regained my balance to a roaring applause/laughter from the audience.
“And…uh…this just goes to show you ladies and gentleman,” I fumbled, “When you deal the deck of business cards without eye contact or consideration…uh…people may as well set them on fire – because they're not going to read them anyway!”
Nice save.
Habit #4: Unprofessional Information It's remarkable how often some business cards will contain unprofessional information. Have you ever received someone's card with one of those ambiguous, offensive and questionable email addresses with AOL, Hotmail or Yahoo? Not only are those email servers frustrating and ineffective for business communication, but just imagine how it looks when someone has to send business emails to:
• HotLips98@aol.com
• KaylasMommyRules@yahoo.com
• Isellcars2U@hotmail.com
I have nothing against AOL, Hotmail or Yahoo. But if possible, always send and receive emails using the address of your organization's website, i.e., scott@hellomynameisscott.com. If you must use free servers like MSN, SBC and the like, choose a simple username that doesn't question your professionalism, i.e., jackgateman@yahoo.com.
Habit #4: Sit with the Wrong Company I'll never forget my first Chamber meeting. One afternoon I sat down with 6 other local businesspeople for our monthly networking lunch. Naturally, the first thing I did was look at everyone's nametags. (Not only to learn their names but to examine the effectiveness of their nametags' design and placement.)
But these were the nametags I saw: ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, Scott. (Company name changed to protect the victims.)
Highly Horrible networkers not only attend meetings with their friends and/or coworkers, but they talk and sit with them the entire time! These are people with whom they've worked 5 days a week, 8 hours a day for the past 3 years! This is not a good technique to maximize your company's visibility.
This habit creates an elitist, unfriendly attitude. And think how uncomfortable this makes the one or two people sitting at the table who don't work for that company! It's unfair to them because they're unable to meet a diverse group of people with whom to develop mutually valuable relationships! Remember: If you're sitting with YOUR company – you're sitting with the WRONG company.
Habit #6: Small Talk is for Suckers Highly Horrible Networkers forget about the small talk. It's a waste of their time. They don't ask or answer about “New and exciting things happening at work” or “How Thanksgiving was,” they simply jump right into (what they believe to be) the most important part of the discussion: selling 17 of their products before the salad arrives.
Has this ever happened to you? For example, has someone ever introduced themselves, breezed right through the conversation and flat out asked you for a referral?
Refer you? I don't even know you!
Reciprocating self-disclosure is the most effective way to build rapport and ultimately develop trust. The people you want to do business with are those with whom you have built that rapport and trust. So, small talk is not for suckers. Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk put it best when she said: “Small talk is the biggest talk we do.”
Habit #7: Limitations Finally, Highly Horrible Networkers believe there is only one specific time and place for networking. It's called “A Room with A Sign Posted Outside That Says So.” In other words, they only network when someone forces them to. They don't believe networking opportunities in places like elevators, busses, supermarkets or parks.
That's it? A measly half hour for networking? Doesn't give you much time, does it?
The truth about networking is that it can happen anytime, anywhere. There is a time and a place for networking – it's called ANY time, and ANY place.
1. Keep in mind that networking is about being genuine and authentic, building trust and relationships, and seeing how you can help others.
2. Ask yourself what your goals are in participating in networking meetings so that you will pick groups that will help you get what you are looking for. Some meetings are based more on learning, making contacts, and/or volunteering rather than on strictly making business connections.
3. Visit as many groups as possible that spark your interest. Notice the tone and attitude of the group. Do the people sound supportive of one another? Does the leadership appear competent? Many groups will allow you to visit two times before joining.
4. Hold volunteer positions in organizations. This is a great way to stay visible and give back to groups that have helped you.
5. Ask open-ended questions in networking conversations. This means questions that ask who, what, where, when, and how as opposed to those that can be answered with a simple yes or no. This form of questioning opens up the discussion and shows listeners that you are interested in them.
6. Become known as a powerful resource for others. When you are known as a strong resource, people remember to turn to you for suggestions, ideas, names of other people, etc. This keeps you visible to them.
7. Have a clear understanding of what you do and why, for whom, and what makes your doing it special or different from others doing the same thing. In order to get referrals, you must first have a clear understanding of what you do that you can easily articulate to others.
8. Be able to articulate what you are looking for and how others may help you. Too often people in conversations ask, "How may I help you?" and no immediate answer comes to mind.
9. Follow through quickly and efficiently on referrals you are given. When people give you referrals, your actions are a reflection on them. Respect and honor that and your referrals will grow.
10. Call those you meet who may benefit from what you do and vice versa. Express that you enjoyed meeting them, and ask if you could get together and share ideas.
When Business Cards Aren't Enough:
7 Unusual, Uncommon and Unexpected
Networking Secrets to Help Boost Business
There comes a time in every small businessperson’s life when common networking practices like handing out business cards, attending various meetings and schmoozing with potential clients only goes so far. Eventually, the same old techniques get overused to the point that they become insufficient.
But how many times have you gained new business, created a great relationship or watched your website hits skyrocket because you did something unusual? Or uncommon? Perhaps even unexpected? Maybe you were on the right track.
The following is a list of atypical networking techniques that will help boost business. WARNING: They will stretch your courage. They will test your expertise. And they will challenge your creativity. But when business cards aren’t enough, alternative ways to develop and maintain mutually valuable relationships are your ticket to networking success.
What’s Your Story?
How did you get your start in business? Did you “fall” into your line of work? Perhaps there was an interesting anecdote, epiphany or event that caused the birth of your business. If so, this is called “Your Story.” Now, it’s not your Elevator Speech or your 30 Second Commercial. It’s your story. And it’s a fundamental tool for helping people and potential customers get to know you.
Here’s the key: write it out. Practice saying it aloud. Make it funny. And tell it to everybody. Not only does this create a memorable presence, but the more you share it with people, the more they will share Your Story with other people. Why? Because people don’t remember things, they remember stories. And after a while, the word about Your Story will spread.
Mix the Medium and Wow People
When I receive an email from an organization or business who has a question, wants to work together or just wants to chat, I do something called Mix the Medium. Here's how it works:
1) The exact moment I finish reading the email, I obtain the person’s phone number (if I don’t already have it.) If there's no email signature, I look at their email address or go to their website. If all I know is their company, I call Directory Assistance or look them up on City Search. Basically, I do anything I can to get their phone number within the next two minutes.
2) Then I call them right back.
3) I then say, "Hi, this is Scott Ginsberg. I was in the office when your email came through and I thought I’d call you back!" I say with a big smile on my face.
PEOPLE LOVE THIS. I have never done this without completely blowing the caller away. They respond with such excited phrases as "Wow, that was fast!" or "I'm impressed you called back already!" In fact, I recently received an email from a friend of mine who just changed jobs. He was writing to say hello and wish me a Happy New Year. And since I hadn’t heard from Jake in quite a while, I Mixed the Medium and called him right back. Five minutes later he booked me to do one of my speaking programs for his new organization!
Network en Masse
Speaking of speaking, here’s another untapped networking resource: local groups, organizations and associations. But I’m not talking about joining; I’m talking about giving a speech. It’s what I call “Networking en Masse.”
Small businesspeople are successful because they’re experts on something. So whether you’re in sales, printing, tech consulting or retail, find a way to transform your expertise into an informative, concise and entertaining speech that will help other people like yourself boost business.
Contact the meeting coordinator of your local Chamber, Rotary Club, Networking Group or Trade Association. They always need speakers. Offer the group a free 15-20 minute program. Include valuable tips, stories, illustrations and examples from your own business experiences that are of interest to the members. By speaking, you position yourself as an expert, validate your credibility and increase your company’s visibility.
Write as an Expert
Another underused networking tactic is writing articles or tip sheets about hot topics in your industry. You don’t even have to be a freelance writer or a journalist – just a business professional who can effectively convey his or her expertise in the form of a short article. Similar to speaking, writing articles in a publication read by your target market is the perfect way to position you and your company.
Here’s how to get started with this tip: Go to Google, type in your topic of expertise and the word “article.” For example, if you work in phone book advertising, type in “phone book advertising article.” (Be sure to use the quotation marks.) Hundreds of hits will come up. Read through a few dozen of them. This will give you an idea of what hot topics other people in your industry are writing articles about. Then, find out which online databases, ezines, newsletters or websites syndicated the articles you just read. By localizing these sources, you can contact the editors and inquire about article submission guidelines. (And if you get the opportunity to publish articles online, you can easily email the article link to other people who would benefit from reading your work.)
Don’t Fear the Big Shots
You’d be surprised how approachable some of the so-called “Big Shots” are. Great example: At a National Speakers Association Convention in July of 2004, I had the pleasure of attending a session with Seth Godin, best selling author of Unleashing the Ideavirus and Purple Cow. Now, in addition hearing him speak, I’ve also been a frequent reader of his books and articles for years. And a few months after seeing him live I thought, “What the heck…maybe I’ll just drop him an email.”
So it came to pass on October 8th, 2004, that I emailed Seth Godin. I told him how much I enjoyed his speech at the convention and that his work was a big influence on my own books and speeches. I also told him to check out my website, www.hellomynameisscott.com, for it was an example of the kind of idea he so passionately supported.
What did I have to lose, right?
To my surprise about a half hour later, he wrote me back. “Thanks for the kind words, Scott! I blogged your site. Good luck.”
Little did I realize that Seth Godin publishes one of the top ten most frequently read blogs in the world. As a result, I received over 70,000 hits on my website in one day! This resulted in some great new contacts, several exciting business opportunities and the birth of my own blog, which is now a critical part of my business! Which brings me to my last networking tip.
Blog For Bucks
If you don’t already have a blog for your business – get one. A blog is an online journal on which you can post comments, links, stories and articles. This popular new medium through which to share your feelings, experiences and emotions is a free and fun way to network with other online professionals. After I talked with Seth last year, I started the blog for my business, and it’s become a valuable tool to stimulate personal dialogue with potential customers. It’s also a great way to let your customers know what’s going on in your life.
For more information go to www.blogger.com; or do a search for any of the various blog providers.
The commonality of these unusual, uncommon and unexpected networking techniques is this: you must do what nobody else is willing to do. Sure, handing out business cards and attending meetings are all good techniques. But everyone does that. So are you willing to practice telling Your Story? Would you call people right back when they’re expecting you to email them tomorrow? Do you have the courage to give a great speech, write a helpful article or start a blog that shares your expertise? And are you willing to get in contact with a Big Shot?
I hope so – because eventually, business cards just aren’t enough!
Catch More Clients Using Strategic Networking
Is networking helping you bring in the new clients you want?
If you are like most independent professionals and small business owners, you put hard work into getting your name out there and distribute your business card wherever you go. You may even attend a weekly or monthly networking group or occasional business conference where people share leads. And like most people, your time and effort isn’t generating a steady stream of new business.
The problem is that most people think that networking consists of telling as many people as possible what they do, and handing out as many business cards as they can. They waste the few precious moments they have with new and existing contacts by focusing on themselves.
Its possible to meet someone in the airport, hand them your card after a brief conversation, and have them call you to request your services, but this random approach is like playing the lottery. You can’t count on it to produce results. It is a Push and Pray technique: you push your information out to others and pray that they respond.
It rarely works. Your contact loses your card or simply forgets about you, or the timing wasn’t right, or, in spite of the connection you thought you’d made, a single conversation usually isn’t enough to launch a client relationship.
That initial conversation should be about understanding your prospects’ problems, needs and concerns, and collecting their contact information. The objective of networking is not to expound on your credentials.
Spend the time you have with prospects (or people who might know a prospect) asking questions and collecting information. Then you can determine whether they would have any genuine interest in/need for the solutions you provide. Use this client problem centered networking strategy to initiate and build profitable relationships.
Pull Information
1. See how many cards you can collect from prospects, and
don’t worry about how many of your own business cards you distribute. Some successful marketers don’t even have a business card.
2. When you meet people, use the time to gather information from them, including:
• Primary concerns about their business
• Problems they want solved
• Unmet business needs
• Areas where the solutions you provide overlap with their needs
• Their contact information
3. Continue to expand your network. Whenever you make a contact, ask for referrals to other prospects.
4. Once you have this information, enter it into your
database or contact manager.
Build Relationships
1. People have short memories. Follow-up after your initial contact and then stay in touch with your network on a regular basis. If you let more than a month go by without making contact they’ll forget that you exist and that you are the best person to solve their financial, legal, human resource, design, or other problems.
You’ll want to make personal contact with some people on your prospect list, but in most cases, a letter, newsletter or ezine will do the job. Use the merge function in your software to personalize your mailings.
2. Demonstrate the value of your expertise or products by sending prospects and clients an idea or suggestion they can use right away. You could present this in an article you’ve written, or one you’ve read. Your contact will then associate you with the problems you solve.
Pull information from prospects and clients to grow your network, stay in touch and regularly demonstrate the value of your products and services.
Networking should be one of the core marketing tactics of most independent professionals and small business owners. Use client-centered networking to lessen your reliance on costly and time consuming cold calling/telemarketing and advertising. Over time, this business building strategy will reward you with a steady stream of new clients.
Top 10 Ways to Maximize Your Networking Approachability
After reading and researching thousands of books, articles and other resources on communication, first impressions, networking and conversation, I’ve learned one thing: none of them address what approachability means. Or maybe they just don’t take the time to define it, stress its importance and offer suggestions on how to maximize it.
That research was my impetus for writing The Power of Approachability. I wanted to give people a clear picture of what the idea meant, along with many small tips and suggestions to put that idea to use – one conversation at a time.
So, straight from the pages of the book, here are my Top Ten Ways to Maximize Your Networking Approachability.
Ready to Engage
The word approachability derives from the Latin verb appropriare, which means “to come nearer to.” Interesting. It doesn’t say anything about the approach-er or the approach-ee. Just “to come nearer to.” So the first idea to remember is that approachability is a two way street. It’s both you stepping onto someone else’s front porch; and you inviting someone to step onto your front porch.
Although this article will address both sides of the street, here’s an example of the former. When you arrive at a meeting, event, party or anywhere in which many conversations will take place, prepare yourself. Be “ready to engage” with conversation topics, questions and stories in the back of your mind ready to go as soon as you meet someone. This will help you avoid those awkward “How’s the weather” type of discussions.
CPI
This acronym stands for the Common Point of Interest. It’s an essential element to every conversation and interaction. Your duty, as you meet new people, or even as you talk with those you already know, is to discover the CPI as soon as possible. It connects people to you. It allows them to feel more comfortable talking to you. And it increases your approachability inasmuch as people will be magnetized to you due to the commonality you share.
A great tip is to ask the right type of questions. Similar to our first example, “ready to engage,” you don’t want to ask people about the weather. You can do better than that! Instead, ask questions that begin with “What’s your favorite…” “Tell me the best…” or “When was the last time…” The CPI is almost guaranteed to be discovered.
Flavored Answers
In the event that one of those Fruitless Questions like “How’s it going?” “What’s up?” or “How are you?” comes up, don’t fall into the F.I.N.E. trap. In fact, fine isn’t even a word. No, seriously! I looked the word up in 23 different dictionaries and it wasn’t listed! Upon further research I discovered that F.I.N.E. is an acronym for “Feelings I’m Not Expressing.”
A great technique is to offer a Flavored Answer to a Fruitless Question. Instead of “fine,” try “Amazing!” “Any better and I’d be twins!” or “Everything is beautiful.” Your conversation partner will instantly change his or her demeanor as they smile and, most of the time, inquirer further to find out what made you say that answer. Because nobody expects it. And offering a true response to magnify the way you feel is a perfect way to share yourself with others, or “make yourself personally available” to others.
Don’t Cross Your Arms
Even if it’s cold, even if you’re bored, even if you’re tired and don’t want to be there – don’t cross your arms. It’s such a simple, subconscious non-verbal cue that too many people practice and it hinders their approachability.
As a result, people won’t want to “bother” you. They will form the impression that you are defensive, nervous, judgmental, close minded or skeptical. Honestly, would you want to approach someone like that? I know I wouldn’t.
Don’t Assume
Every time you assume, you end up making an … yeah, yeah, yeah – we get it. Or do we? How many times have we uttered one of the following sentences, only to be stricken with a terrible case of Foot-In-Mouth Disease?
• You must be new here?
• How’s work going?
• Do you remember me?
Remember, just because someone walks in whom you’ve never seen before – doesn’t mean he’s new. Or just because you’re at a networking meeting – doesn’t mean everyone in attendance has a job. And believe me, not everyone you remember – remembers you.
Approachability is a function of comfort, so it’s important to sidestep these moments of embarrassment with Success Sentences. These are phrases that allow the other person to offer you’re the information you need to know. Examples include, “I’m not sure we’ve met before,” “What are you working on this week?” and “I’m Scott, we met last month at the Chamber meeting.”
Options for Communication
Your friends, colleagues, customers and coworkers will choose to communicate with you in different ways. Some will choose face to face, some will email, others will call, while others will do a little of everything. The bottom line is: make all of them available. On your business cards, email signatures, websites or marketing materials, let people know that can get in touch with you in whatever manner they choose. Sure, you might prefer email. But what matters most is the comfort of the other person and their ability to communicate effectively.
A good idea is to give people as many options to contact you as possible. There’s nothing more annoying to a “phone person” than when she discovers she can’t get a hold of you unless she emails you.
Email Signature
Whatever program you use for email - Outlook, Eudora, Yahoo, Hotmail - find out how to customize your signature. There's nothing more frustrating than receiving an email from someone who wants to talk further, get together or have you send them something that doesn't have any personal information in the email. So at the end of every email you send, always cross reference the following information:
• Name
• Title
• Company/Organization
• Mailing address
• At least two phone numbers
• Fax number
• Email address
• Website
• A sentence or two about yourself, your company or your job
Think of it this way: have you ever received a handwritten letter from someone that had no return address stamped on the envelope?
Always Have Business Cards
Have you ever told a story about a successful, serendipitous business encounter that ended with the phrase, “Thank God I had one of my business cards with me that day!”? If so, great! You’re practicing approachability by being “easy to reach.”
If not, you’ve no doubt missed out on valuable relationships and opportunities. And it happens – people forget cards, get their supply reprinted or change jobs. But the bottom line is; there is a time and place for networking: ANY time and ANY place. Because you just never know whom you might meet.
No Fear
They won’t say hello back to me. They won’t be interested in me. I will make a fool of myself. This is the number one reason people don’t start conversations. However, practice will make this fear fade away. The more often you you start conversations, the better you will become at it. So, be the first to introduce yourself or say hello. When you take an active instead of a passive role, your skills will develop and there will be less of a chance for rejection. Also understand the gains vs. losses. For example, what’s so bad about a rejection from someone you don’t even know?
Wear Your Nametag
I’ve heard every possible complaint about wearing nametags, and all of them can be validated. Case in point:
• Nametags look silly – yes, they do. But remember, everyone else is wearing them too.
• Nametags ruin my clothes – not if you wear them on the edge of your lapel or use cloth-safe connectors like lanyards and plastic clips.
• But I already know everybody – no you don’t. You may think you do, but new people come in and out of businesses and organizations all the time.
• But everyone already knows me – no they don’t. Even the best networkers know there’s always someone new to meet.
Your nametag is your best friend for several reasons. First of all, a person’s name is the single context of human memory most forgotten. And people are less likely to approach you if they don’t know (or forgot) your name. Secondly, it’s free advertising for you and your company. Third, nametags encourage people to be friendly and more approachable. TRUST me on that one!
Gain Control of Your Marketing Efforts and Assure a Steady Flow of Clients
When it comes to marketing, do you ever feel like you are at the mercy of the tides – following up on a referral here, chasing a lead there and more often than not ending up battered and bruised by the rocks along the shoreline? There is a simple solution. It is a solution that will put you in control of your marketing efforts and help assure a steady flow of prospective clients: develop and use a contact management database.
Now what could be simpler? And if you invest in developing your database, like an investment in a great stock or mutual fund, your return will be many times the initial investment. As with most things knowing what needs to be done is simple. Actually doing them or doing them successfully is a little bit more complicated. That is why so many of us have contact management databases like ACT! or Goldmine installed on our computers with nary a name entered in while we continue to be tossed about helplessly like a seashell in the marketing tide.
Gain control of your marketing efforts now!
Set-up a contact management database – Pick a program – ACT! and Goldmine are popular contact management databases. Outlook may even work if you’re just getting started. And coaches should definitely explore Client Compass, a customized business management software including a client and prospect database, developed for coaches by coaches. Talk to other people in your line of business to see what they are using and what they like and dislike about the program. Give some thought to how you might use the database and what types of information you want to collect.
Here are some general things to consider as you start this process:
• Have one list. Setting up multiple lists for example one with everyone you met at one networking event, another with names from a second networking event and a third from a mailing list you purchased leads to duplicates that at best needlessly increases costs and at worst irritates your prospective clients with duplicate mailings. Be especially careful of this when doing mass e-mailing.
• Set-up fields so contacts can be sorted in multiple ways. For example, you would want to include fields for the source of the name; the type of business the individual is in; which of your products/services they are most likely to be interested in; and whether they are a suspect, prospect, potential referral source, current client, past client, etc.
• Determine other purposes for which you may want to use the database. Client Compass for example has a multitude of functions helpful to managing a coaching practice including client and prospect information tracking, coaching call summaries, administration, marketing and invoicing. There's even a credit card billing option. Goldmine can be used to track both opportunities (proposals that you might have out and the status of the proposals) as well as active projects – especially helpful for consulting projects where multiple people may be involved.
• Be sure you can easily use the names for direct mail and e-mail purposes. The database program should have the capability to do merge mailings and e-mails to selected groups or the ability to export to other programs such as Excel so mail merges can be accomplished.
Invest in the technology and the assistance necessary to set-up a functional database system because this is one of the most valuable tools in constructing an effective marketing program.
Feed the database on a regular basis. The best designed database with all the latest technological bells and whistles is useless if it doesn’t have any names in it. The primary objective of much of your promotional efforts should be obtaining contact information for individuals who fit the profile of your target customer. You can then enter this information into your database and begin the relationship development process with these individuals.
So how can you feed your database?
• Networking. When you are networking be sure to ask for the cards of the people you meet who could be prospective customers. In fact, it is much more important to obtain their card than it is to give them your card.
• Speaking. When you speak or do presentations be sure you have a mechanism for obtaining the names of the people in attendance. A door prize is one good way to do this.
• Writing. If you write articles be sure to invite readers to your website to sign-up for your regular newsletter or a free guide.
• Direct mail and advertising. With a few exceptions, the goal of direct mail or advertising should not be to make a sale. It should be to obtain contact information so you can continue to market to those individuals who have shown an interest in your services. Therefore your promotional pieces should be designed to get a maximum number of people with even a slight interest in your services to provide you their contact information. Giving away a free guide is one excellent way to accomplish this.
Obviously once you have contact information it must be entered into the database. The 500 cards you collected through networking activities last year aren’t doing much good wrapped in a rubber band lying in desk drawer. If you get even a few business cards a week that need to be entered into the database it is well worth an investment in a card scanning program such as CardScan. Be sure the program you select allows export of the contact information to the contact database program you will be using. In fact, a program like CardScan could serve as the primary contact management system if you are just getting started. If adding names to your database is something you just never seem to get done the investment in some administrative support to accomplish this task can pay off handsomely.
Consistently nurture the names in the database. A great database with hundreds or even thousands of names in it is useless unless you actually have contact with the names in the database. This is a topic for another article or even a whole book. At a minimum there should be follow-up with every contact shortly after you receive their contact information (i.e. a note or e-mail to someone you met at a networking event within a few days of meeting them) and regular, planned contact with them at least monthly going forward. With today’s technology much of this can be automated.
Protect this valuable asset. Your contact database is one of your most valuable assets. Be sure you protect it. Do regular back-ups and store these back-ups off site. For about the cost of a week’s worth of Starbuck ’s coffee you can have all of your files backed up automatically each night and stored on a remote server. What would be the cost of replacing your contact database?
Get your feet planted solidly in the sand. Invest in developing, maintaining and using a contact management database to harness the power of the marketing tides and generate the leads you need to grow the business of your dreams.
7 Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™
Networking is a term that didn't exist (academically) until almost 40 years ago. It's a word uttered in and around the business world every day, yet is unclear to most as to how it actually works. Still, it's a fundamental tool to the success of any business.
By definition, the term networking is the development and maintenance of mutually valuable relationships. It's not schmoozing; it's not just handing out business cards, selling, marketing or small talk. Those activities are part of networking, but unfortunately, many people's misunderstanding of the term causes them network ineffectively.
The following are The 7 Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™, and they can stand in the in your way of developing mutually valuable relationships. So, next time you attend your Chamber or Association meeting, keep these ideas in mind so you can offer the most value to your fellow networkers.
Habit #1: Attitude Much like the development of any skill, networking begins with attitude. Unfortunately, Highly Horrible Networkers have the wrong attitude. If you've ever attended a networking function before, perhaps you've encountered businesspeople who act in the following ways:
• The hard sell – they believe networking is about one thing and one thing only: selling products and services to everyone in the room.
• Business only – they're not there to make friends. They're not there to have fun. And they're certainly not interested in developing mutually valuable relationships.
• It's all about me – they don't take the time to help and share with others, but rather focus on their own needs. In other words, they can't spell “N-E-T-W-O-R-K-I-N-G” without “I.”
Attitude is fundamental to effective networking. In fact, it's the most important habit to understand.
Habit #2: Dig Your Well WHEN You're Thirsty One of my favorite networking books is called Dig Your Well Before You're Thirsty, by Harvey McKay. It's probably the most well known text on this subject. The key to McKay's work is making your friends, establishing contacts and developing relationships – before you need them. Getting what you want by helping others get what they want first.
Enter the Highly Horrible Networkers, who only network because:
a) They need new customers
b) They have a new product or service to sell
c) Their boss forced them to do so
Take my friend Lawrence, for example. He's quite successful in the insurance business
; however he recently approached me about using networking to obtain some hot leads.
“My numbers are down. My boss is on my back. I gotta get out there and start networking…or else! What do you suggest?”
“Networking takes time,” I explained, “and you can't expect to come into loads of business or dozens of potential clients without developing the relationships first.”
As you already learned, networking is the development and maintenance of mutually valuable relationships…over time. If you try to dig your well WHEN you're thirsty, you may never find a drink.
Habit #3: Dealin' the Deck Habit #3 is a dangerous one, and it happens all the time. Have you ever seen people distribute 173 of their business cards during the first 5 minutes of the event? They move as quickly as possible from one person to the next. They don't make eye contact, they don't ask to exchange cards – they just deal them out.
“Here's my card, call me if you need a designer! See ya later.”
“But…I…never even got your name!” you muse.
This is guaranteed to make people feel puny and insignificant. Notice these Highly Horrible Networkers don't spend time actually meeting and establishing rapport with new people; but rather concentrate on giving out as many cards as possible. It's quantity over quality, right?
Wrong.
Dealin' the Deck is one of the most common networking pet peeves. Whenever I give my program The Habits of Highly Horrible Networkers™, I walk out into the audience for a quick demonstration of this habit. I grab a stack of business cards and quickly jump from table to table tossing out dozens of them without as much looking at the audience members I'm handing them to.
Unfortunately during one speech, it backfired.
Literally.
Last year, I was demonstrating Highly Horrible Habit #3 when speaking at a local business meeting. While hopping from table to table as dozens of cards flew through the air and into people's laps and salads, someone yelled out, “Oh my God!”
I stopped dead in my tracks. I looked back at the head table and noticed that one of my cards landed in the centerpiece…
…which was a candle!
MY BUSINESS CARD WAS ON FIRE!!
I threw down the microphone, lunged at the table and snatched the burning business card from the candle! As I toppled over the chair in front of me I yelled something to the effect of “Oh my God!” shook the flames off my half burnt card and regained my balance to a roaring applause/laughter from the audience.
“And…uh…this just goes to show you ladies and gentleman,” I fumbled, “When you deal the deck of business cards without eye contact or consideration…uh…people may as well set them on fire – because they're not going to read them anyway!”
Nice save.
Habit #4: Unprofessional Information It's remarkable how often some business cards will contain unprofessional information. Have you ever received someone's card with one of those ambiguous, offensive and questionable email addresses with AOL, Hotmail or Yahoo? Not only are those email servers frustrating and ineffective for business communication, but just imagine how it looks when someone has to send business emails to:
• HotLips98@aol.com
• KaylasMommyRules@yahoo.com
• Isellcars2U@hotmail.com
I have nothing against AOL, Hotmail or Yahoo. But if possible, always send and receive emails using the address of your organization's website, i.e., scott@hellomynameisscott.com. If you must use free servers like MSN, SBC and the like, choose a simple username that doesn't question your professionalism, i.e., jackgateman@yahoo.com.
Habit #4: Sit with the Wrong Company I'll never forget my first Chamber meeting. One afternoon I sat down with 6 other local businesspeople for our monthly networking lunch. Naturally, the first thing I did was look at everyone's nametags. (Not only to learn their names but to examine the effectiveness of their nametags' design and placement.)
But these were the nametags I saw: ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, ADM Financial, Scott. (Company name changed to protect the victims.)
Highly Horrible networkers not only attend meetings with their friends and/or coworkers, but they talk and sit with them the entire time! These are people with whom they've worked 5 days a week, 8 hours a day for the past 3 years! This is not a good technique to maximize your company's visibility.
This habit creates an elitist, unfriendly attitude. And think how uncomfortable this makes the one or two people sitting at the table who don't work for that company! It's unfair to them because they're unable to meet a diverse group of people with whom to develop mutually valuable relationships! Remember: If you're sitting with YOUR company – you're sitting with the WRONG company.
Habit #6: Small Talk is for Suckers Highly Horrible Networkers forget about the small talk. It's a waste of their time. They don't ask or answer about “New and exciting things happening at work” or “How Thanksgiving was,” they simply jump right into (what they believe to be) the most important part of the discussion: selling 17 of their products before the salad arrives.
Has this ever happened to you? For example, has someone ever introduced themselves, breezed right through the conversation and flat out asked you for a referral?
Refer you? I don't even know you!
Reciprocating self-disclosure is the most effective way to build rapport and ultimately develop trust. The people you want to do business with are those with whom you have built that rapport and trust. So, small talk is not for suckers. Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk put it best when she said: “Small talk is the biggest talk we do.”
Habit #7: Limitations Finally, Highly Horrible Networkers believe there is only one specific time and place for networking. It's called “A Room with A Sign Posted Outside That Says So.” In other words, they only network when someone forces them to. They don't believe networking opportunities in places like elevators, busses, supermarkets or parks.
That's it? A measly half hour for networking? Doesn't give you much time, does it?
The truth about networking is that it can happen anytime, anywhere. There is a time and a place for networking – it's called ANY time, and ANY place.
Money in 30 days
How to Make Real Money in 30 Days With Little or No Money Upfront
Instructions.Things You'll Need:
•Desire
•Persistance
•Open Mind
Step
1Here are several quick ways you can make money with little or no money out of your own pocket. I'll be writing more detailed articles on each one, but if you want more info before I get them published, feel free to contact me.
Step
2Bubble Gum Machines- I started placing candy/bubble gum machines about 6 years ago. My first machine I bought off ebay for $17 (total). It was old and I had to clean it, paint it, and make a stand-total investment with candy = $35. I put in my break room at work- first week it took in $8! That was 6 years ago, I then started placing machines in other break rooms at work, restaurants.. They average a net profit of about $20/mo. Some bring in $40-60 month. You can start
w/one and add as many as you want. Check them when you get a chance. They are like money trees- every 30 days you go 'pick' the money off, it just keeps growing back. They're pretty much recession proof.
To do it w/out any money- Have a print out of a bubble gum machine- talk to local business OWNERS or MANAGERS about placing a machine in their business for their customer-you do all the work- they get 20% off the top for nothing- once they say yes- then you talk to other businesses about placing their advertisement on the bubble gum machine- $100/year/ location- negotiable- show them your locations- collect their ad fee- buy the machine and candy (ebay is great place for machines)create their ad on a computer and print it out on peel and stick paper for the front of your machine. Sam's Club is a good place to get the candy. Return on investment is Huge! Hospital break rooms- business break rooms are great because you keep all the money.
Step
3Ebay- I know it's been said a million times, but it's worth repeating.
My first experiences with ebay, I bought a real estate course, studied, added a bonus to it and re-sold it for a profit of about $75- Hmm I'm on to something. These course were hot items- so I bought ones that were bigger lots bundled together. I studied them all myself (my passion is real estate) resold them individually and made money.
You can find similar items bundled together- resell them individually.
Sell stuff in your house, you'd be amazed. My wife tried to get rid of some audio books on tape I had for 25 cents at a yard sale. I put them on ebay and sold them for $10 + $4.95 S&H! Dropshipping is a big way
to sell items you don't buy up front. Find a dropshipper on the internet- list the items for sale on your website,ebay,etc.- collect the money- send the order to your dropshipper and they will send the product to your customer with your name/address on it. You keep the difference between what you sold it for and what you paid your drop shipper. One such company is SMC- Specialty Merchandise Corp.
Step
4Craigslist.com - AWESOME. I've sold several items locally the same day!
It's like a plain vanilla NO COST- classified ad website. Check it out!
Step
5Advertising business- Yes an ad business. Businesses are always looking for ways to get their name/image infront of captive audiences.
I had a display business in which I had a computer generated image of a wall display that would go in a golf pro shop or any waiting area. The display had pockets for brochures- a pushpin bulletin board in the middle for the use of the location- and 8.5 x 11 windows down one side
for advertisers who "sponsored" the display. I got agreements from local golf shops, civic center, restaurants to place such a display, pending getting enough sponsors, then sold the ads to other businesses.
One ad, $500/year, more than paid for the cost of the display, all additional ads were almost pure profit. I sold one doctor's office 5 ads at one time to promote their new 'lasiks' procedure. $2500 in about 1 hour. I also sold ads on the tables in restaurants w/customized salt/pepper holders. Your creativity is the only limit in this business.
Step
6Real Estate Deals! - yes w/less that $50 you can make big bucks in real estate. How? Option contracts. Very simple-one page contracts. In a nutshell - You find someone who really needs/wants to sell their property at a good price - you negotiate that price and offer them a non-refundable fee of $25 for the Option to purchase it at that price in
the next 30-45 days. If you don't then they keep your $25, but you can take that options contract and sell it (the contract) to an investor or someone who wants to buy the house. They buy the "option contract" from you for ? $1000-$10,000? depending on how good the deal is. Then at this point you're out of the picture. Your buyer then exercises the option to buy that property from the original seller of the property.
There are certain details you need to make sure of, but it's not much more complicated than that. You can make BIG bucks just selling one or two contracts per month.
Instructions.Things You'll Need:
•Desire
•Persistance
•Open Mind
Step
1Here are several quick ways you can make money with little or no money out of your own pocket. I'll be writing more detailed articles on each one, but if you want more info before I get them published, feel free to contact me.
Step
2Bubble Gum Machines- I started placing candy/bubble gum machines about 6 years ago. My first machine I bought off ebay for $17 (total). It was old and I had to clean it, paint it, and make a stand-total investment with candy = $35. I put in my break room at work- first week it took in $8! That was 6 years ago, I then started placing machines in other break rooms at work, restaurants.. They average a net profit of about $20/mo. Some bring in $40-60 month. You can start
w/one and add as many as you want. Check them when you get a chance. They are like money trees- every 30 days you go 'pick' the money off, it just keeps growing back. They're pretty much recession proof.
To do it w/out any money- Have a print out of a bubble gum machine- talk to local business OWNERS or MANAGERS about placing a machine in their business for their customer-you do all the work- they get 20% off the top for nothing- once they say yes- then you talk to other businesses about placing their advertisement on the bubble gum machine- $100/year/ location- negotiable- show them your locations- collect their ad fee- buy the machine and candy (ebay is great place for machines)create their ad on a computer and print it out on peel and stick paper for the front of your machine. Sam's Club is a good place to get the candy. Return on investment is Huge! Hospital break rooms- business break rooms are great because you keep all the money.
Step
3Ebay- I know it's been said a million times, but it's worth repeating.
My first experiences with ebay, I bought a real estate course, studied, added a bonus to it and re-sold it for a profit of about $75- Hmm I'm on to something. These course were hot items- so I bought ones that were bigger lots bundled together. I studied them all myself (my passion is real estate) resold them individually and made money.
You can find similar items bundled together- resell them individually.
Sell stuff in your house, you'd be amazed. My wife tried to get rid of some audio books on tape I had for 25 cents at a yard sale. I put them on ebay and sold them for $10 + $4.95 S&H! Dropshipping is a big way
to sell items you don't buy up front. Find a dropshipper on the internet- list the items for sale on your website,ebay,etc.- collect the money- send the order to your dropshipper and they will send the product to your customer with your name/address on it. You keep the difference between what you sold it for and what you paid your drop shipper. One such company is SMC- Specialty Merchandise Corp.
Step
4Craigslist.com - AWESOME. I've sold several items locally the same day!
It's like a plain vanilla NO COST- classified ad website. Check it out!
Step
5Advertising business- Yes an ad business. Businesses are always looking for ways to get their name/image infront of captive audiences.
I had a display business in which I had a computer generated image of a wall display that would go in a golf pro shop or any waiting area. The display had pockets for brochures- a pushpin bulletin board in the middle for the use of the location- and 8.5 x 11 windows down one side
for advertisers who "sponsored" the display. I got agreements from local golf shops, civic center, restaurants to place such a display, pending getting enough sponsors, then sold the ads to other businesses.
One ad, $500/year, more than paid for the cost of the display, all additional ads were almost pure profit. I sold one doctor's office 5 ads at one time to promote their new 'lasiks' procedure. $2500 in about 1 hour. I also sold ads on the tables in restaurants w/customized salt/pepper holders. Your creativity is the only limit in this business.
Step
6Real Estate Deals! - yes w/less that $50 you can make big bucks in real estate. How? Option contracts. Very simple-one page contracts. In a nutshell - You find someone who really needs/wants to sell their property at a good price - you negotiate that price and offer them a non-refundable fee of $25 for the Option to purchase it at that price in
the next 30-45 days. If you don't then they keep your $25, but you can take that options contract and sell it (the contract) to an investor or someone who wants to buy the house. They buy the "option contract" from you for ? $1000-$10,000? depending on how good the deal is. Then at this point you're out of the picture. Your buyer then exercises the option to buy that property from the original seller of the property.
There are certain details you need to make sure of, but it's not much more complicated than that. You can make BIG bucks just selling one or two contracts per month.
Vampires - Dracula Info
Vampires
"There are such beings as vampires, some of us have evidence that they exist. Even had we not the proof of our own unhappy experience, the teachings and the records of the past give proof enough for sane peoples."
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Chapter 18: MINA HARKER'S JOURNAL - 30 September
The vampires are monsters that has both thrilled and terrified people for hundreds of years, from sophisticated Parisian theatre-goers to Eastern European peasants. Today the myth of vampires is omnipresent as one of the majors horror motifs in arts, literature and music.
Definition
Vampires are mythical or folkloric creatures, typically held to be the re-animated corpses of human beings and said to subsist on human and/or animal blood (hematophagy), often having unnatural powers, heightened bodily functions, and/or the ability to physically transform. Some cultures have myths of non-human vampires, such as demons or animals like bats, dogs, and spiders. Vampires are often described as having a variety of additional powers and character traits, extremely variable in different traditions, and are a frequent subject of folklore, cinema, and contemporary fiction.
Vampire by Clyde Caldwell
Vampirism is the practice of drinking blood from a person/animal. Vampires are said to mainly bite the victim's neck, extracting the blood from the carotid artery. In folklore and popular culture, the term generally refers to a belief that one can gain supernatural powers by drinking human blood. The historical practice of vampirism can generally be considered a more specific and less commonly occurring form of cannibalism. The consumption of another's blood (and/or flesh) has been used as a tactic of psychological warfare intended to terrorize the enemy, and it can be used to reflect various spiritual beliefs.
Vampires in history
Vampire myths go back thousands of years and they are found in almost every culture around the world. Their variety is almost endless; from red eyed monsters with green or pink hair in China to the Greek Lamia which has the upper body of a woman and the lower body of a winged serpent; from vampire foxes in Japan to a head with trailing entrails known as the Penanggalang in Malaysia.
The history of the vampire begins in ancient Persia, where a vase was discovered depicting a man struggling with a huge creature which is trying to suck his blood. Then, there was discovered a deity known for drinking the blood of babies, Lilitu or "Lilith", in a Babylonian myth. During the 6th century BC, traces of the "Living Dead" were also found in China. More legends continued throughout the entire world, including India, Malaysia, Polynesia and the lands of the Aztecs and Eskimos. For example, Aztecs believed that offering a young victim’s blood to the Gods ensured the fertilization of the earth.
The modern concept of the vampire occurs for the first time in European civilization. In both Roman and Greek mythology, there are found numerous bloodthirsty Goddesses, known as Lamiae, Empusae and Striges, names which eventually evolved into the general terms for Witches, Demons and Vampires. But these Vampires, though they do drink blood, were only Goddesses...not "living Dead", but disembodied divinities capable of taking on human appearances so that they might seduce their victims. The vampires we know today are nothing else but mutation determined by fiction and movies.
Types of vampires
1.Blood vampires - Those who feed on blood. They are commonly referred to as "sangs," "sanguinarians," "sanguines," "blood vamps" and they usually have regular donors from whom they feed. Rarely, they feed on animal blood. They ingest blood for the energies found within.
2.Energy vampires - (generally referred to as “psychic vampires") are those vampires who feed on energy directly. They sense and manipulate energy, pulling it into them in order to refill themselves.
That last category can be split into three other categories, in accordance with the specific types of energy the vampires feed on:
1.Sexual Energy vampires - These individuals feed on energy produced during sex, or produced by any other sexual activity or influence. They are often referred to as "pranic" vampires.
2.Elemental Energy vampires - These individuals feed on energy from nature and elements (such as the earth, thunderstorms, the moon, etc.). They are commonly referred to as "elemental vampires."
3.Empathic vampires - These vampires claim to feed on emotions. Emotions are textures, patterns, flavors of energy.
Vampires' powers / abilities
Ability to multiply by contamination - vampires give blood to contaminate souls and spread evil.
Life time - vampires don’t age or die from the passing of time, but they seem to get older when a long period of time passes without feeding themselves. But they can get young again using a blood supply. It also should be saind that most of the vampire's powers increase with age and experience.
Invulnerability - vampires are immune to most a diseases and invincible to mortal weapons, but they became vulnerable when move around during the day or when they rest in the coffins.
Strength - the vampire's physical strength greatly exceeds that of mortals (it is said that they are at least 20 times stronger).
Shape-shifting - vampires have the ability to control several animals such as the wolf, the rat, the fox, the owl, the bat and the moth and they are also capable taking the form of a wolf or a bat and possibly any of the other animals subject to his command. Vampires can also transform themselves into a mist or dust cloud drifting in the air, they can modify their sizes in certain limits, becoming either larger or smaller, and they can climb walls (normally, like a large insect with his head toward the ground much like a spider).
Alliance with the devil - the vampires’ abilities to command some form of magical or monstrous beings (demons, zombies, etc.) are considered to be the proof of vampires’ connection with the demons.
Hypnotic mind control - the vampire may exert his will over the will of his victim (that explains why the victims often have no memory of being attacked).
Vampires' Weaknesses
Day light - vampires are obliged to sleep (actually, they rest in their coffin in a trance that keeps them aware of things happening around) during the day and to rest upon a protective layer of hallowed ground from its native land.
Light is destructive - during the day light, vampires lose their supernatural powers, becoming only human, that’s why mortal weapons may harm them.
Religious symbols - such as the Cross, the Holy Water and other symbols of the Church are considered to be powerful weapons against vampires, werewolves, witches, etc. (it has to be mentioned that only faithful persons are able to use those symbols succesufully).
Invitation - vampires may not enter a home unless they are freely invited in by one of the residents. Once invited, he may come and go at will.
"There are such beings as vampires, some of us have evidence that they exist. Even had we not the proof of our own unhappy experience, the teachings and the records of the past give proof enough for sane peoples."
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Chapter 18: MINA HARKER'S JOURNAL - 30 September
The vampires are monsters that has both thrilled and terrified people for hundreds of years, from sophisticated Parisian theatre-goers to Eastern European peasants. Today the myth of vampires is omnipresent as one of the majors horror motifs in arts, literature and music.
Definition
Vampires are mythical or folkloric creatures, typically held to be the re-animated corpses of human beings and said to subsist on human and/or animal blood (hematophagy), often having unnatural powers, heightened bodily functions, and/or the ability to physically transform. Some cultures have myths of non-human vampires, such as demons or animals like bats, dogs, and spiders. Vampires are often described as having a variety of additional powers and character traits, extremely variable in different traditions, and are a frequent subject of folklore, cinema, and contemporary fiction.
Vampire by Clyde Caldwell
Vampirism is the practice of drinking blood from a person/animal. Vampires are said to mainly bite the victim's neck, extracting the blood from the carotid artery. In folklore and popular culture, the term generally refers to a belief that one can gain supernatural powers by drinking human blood. The historical practice of vampirism can generally be considered a more specific and less commonly occurring form of cannibalism. The consumption of another's blood (and/or flesh) has been used as a tactic of psychological warfare intended to terrorize the enemy, and it can be used to reflect various spiritual beliefs.
Vampires in history
Vampire myths go back thousands of years and they are found in almost every culture around the world. Their variety is almost endless; from red eyed monsters with green or pink hair in China to the Greek Lamia which has the upper body of a woman and the lower body of a winged serpent; from vampire foxes in Japan to a head with trailing entrails known as the Penanggalang in Malaysia.
The history of the vampire begins in ancient Persia, where a vase was discovered depicting a man struggling with a huge creature which is trying to suck his blood. Then, there was discovered a deity known for drinking the blood of babies, Lilitu or "Lilith", in a Babylonian myth. During the 6th century BC, traces of the "Living Dead" were also found in China. More legends continued throughout the entire world, including India, Malaysia, Polynesia and the lands of the Aztecs and Eskimos. For example, Aztecs believed that offering a young victim’s blood to the Gods ensured the fertilization of the earth.
The modern concept of the vampire occurs for the first time in European civilization. In both Roman and Greek mythology, there are found numerous bloodthirsty Goddesses, known as Lamiae, Empusae and Striges, names which eventually evolved into the general terms for Witches, Demons and Vampires. But these Vampires, though they do drink blood, were only Goddesses...not "living Dead", but disembodied divinities capable of taking on human appearances so that they might seduce their victims. The vampires we know today are nothing else but mutation determined by fiction and movies.
Types of vampires
1.Blood vampires - Those who feed on blood. They are commonly referred to as "sangs," "sanguinarians," "sanguines," "blood vamps" and they usually have regular donors from whom they feed. Rarely, they feed on animal blood. They ingest blood for the energies found within.
2.Energy vampires - (generally referred to as “psychic vampires") are those vampires who feed on energy directly. They sense and manipulate energy, pulling it into them in order to refill themselves.
That last category can be split into three other categories, in accordance with the specific types of energy the vampires feed on:
1.Sexual Energy vampires - These individuals feed on energy produced during sex, or produced by any other sexual activity or influence. They are often referred to as "pranic" vampires.
2.Elemental Energy vampires - These individuals feed on energy from nature and elements (such as the earth, thunderstorms, the moon, etc.). They are commonly referred to as "elemental vampires."
3.Empathic vampires - These vampires claim to feed on emotions. Emotions are textures, patterns, flavors of energy.
Vampires' powers / abilities
Ability to multiply by contamination - vampires give blood to contaminate souls and spread evil.
Life time - vampires don’t age or die from the passing of time, but they seem to get older when a long period of time passes without feeding themselves. But they can get young again using a blood supply. It also should be saind that most of the vampire's powers increase with age and experience.
Invulnerability - vampires are immune to most a diseases and invincible to mortal weapons, but they became vulnerable when move around during the day or when they rest in the coffins.
Strength - the vampire's physical strength greatly exceeds that of mortals (it is said that they are at least 20 times stronger).
Shape-shifting - vampires have the ability to control several animals such as the wolf, the rat, the fox, the owl, the bat and the moth and they are also capable taking the form of a wolf or a bat and possibly any of the other animals subject to his command. Vampires can also transform themselves into a mist or dust cloud drifting in the air, they can modify their sizes in certain limits, becoming either larger or smaller, and they can climb walls (normally, like a large insect with his head toward the ground much like a spider).
Alliance with the devil - the vampires’ abilities to command some form of magical or monstrous beings (demons, zombies, etc.) are considered to be the proof of vampires’ connection with the demons.
Hypnotic mind control - the vampire may exert his will over the will of his victim (that explains why the victims often have no memory of being attacked).
Vampires' Weaknesses
Day light - vampires are obliged to sleep (actually, they rest in their coffin in a trance that keeps them aware of things happening around) during the day and to rest upon a protective layer of hallowed ground from its native land.
Light is destructive - during the day light, vampires lose their supernatural powers, becoming only human, that’s why mortal weapons may harm them.
Religious symbols - such as the Cross, the Holy Water and other symbols of the Church are considered to be powerful weapons against vampires, werewolves, witches, etc. (it has to be mentioned that only faithful persons are able to use those symbols succesufully).
Invitation - vampires may not enter a home unless they are freely invited in by one of the residents. Once invited, he may come and go at will.
Vampires - Dracula Info
Vampires
"There are such beings as vampires, some of us have evidence that they exist. Even had we not the proof of our own unhappy experience, the teachings and the records of the past give proof enough for sane peoples."
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Chapter 18: MINA HARKER'S JOURNAL - 30 September
The vampires are monsters that has both thrilled and terrified people for hundreds of years, from sophisticated Parisian theatre-goers to Eastern European peasants. Today the myth of vampires is omnipresent as one of the majors horror motifs in arts, literature and music.
Definition
Vampires are mythical or folkloric creatures, typically held to be the re-animated corpses of human beings and said to subsist on human and/or animal blood (hematophagy), often having unnatural powers, heightened bodily functions, and/or the ability to physically transform. Some cultures have myths of non-human vampires, such as demons or animals like bats, dogs, and spiders. Vampires are often described as having a variety of additional powers and character traits, extremely variable in different traditions, and are a frequent subject of folklore, cinema, and contemporary fiction.
Vampirism is the practice of drinking blood from a person/animal. Vampires are said to mainly bite the victim's neck, extracting the blood from the carotid artery. In folklore and popular culture, the term generally refers to a belief that one can gain supernatural powers by drinking human blood. The historical practice of vampirism can generally be considered a more specific and less commonly occurring form of cannibalism. The consumption of another's blood (and/or flesh) has been used as a tactic of psychological warfare intended to terrorize the enemy, and it can be used to reflect various spiritual beliefs.
Vampires
"There are such beings as vampires, some of us have evidence that they exist. Even had we not the proof of our own unhappy experience, the teachings and the records of the past give proof enough for sane peoples."
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Chapter 18: MINA HARKER'S JOURNAL - 30 September
The vampires are monsters that has both thrilled and terrified people for hundreds of years, from sophisticated Parisian theatre-goers to Eastern European peasants. Today the myth of vampires is omnipresent as one of the majors horror motifs in arts, literature and music.
Definition
Vampires are mythical or folkloric creatures, typically held to be the re-animated corpses of human beings and said to subsist on human and/or animal blood (hematophagy), often having unnatural powers, heightened bodily functions, and/or the ability to physically transform. Some cultures have myths of non-human vampires, such as demons or animals like bats, dogs, and spiders. Vampires are often described as having a variety of additional powers and character traits, extremely variable in different traditions, and are a frequent subject of folklore, cinema, and contemporary fiction.
Vampirism is the practice of drinking blood from a person/animal. Vampires are said to mainly bite the victim's neck, extracting the blood from the carotid artery. In folklore and popular culture, the term generally refers to a belief that one can gain supernatural powers by drinking human blood. The historical practice of vampirism can generally be considered a more specific and less commonly occurring form of cannibalism. The consumption of another's blood (and/or flesh) has been used as a tactic of psychological warfare intended to terrorize the enemy, and it can be used to reflect various spiritual beliefs
"There are such beings as vampires, some of us have evidence that they exist. Even had we not the proof of our own unhappy experience, the teachings and the records of the past give proof enough for sane peoples."
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Chapter 18: MINA HARKER'S JOURNAL - 30 September
The vampires are monsters that has both thrilled and terrified people for hundreds of years, from sophisticated Parisian theatre-goers to Eastern European peasants. Today the myth of vampires is omnipresent as one of the majors horror motifs in arts, literature and music.
Definition
Vampires are mythical or folkloric creatures, typically held to be the re-animated corpses of human beings and said to subsist on human and/or animal blood (hematophagy), often having unnatural powers, heightened bodily functions, and/or the ability to physically transform. Some cultures have myths of non-human vampires, such as demons or animals like bats, dogs, and spiders. Vampires are often described as having a variety of additional powers and character traits, extremely variable in different traditions, and are a frequent subject of folklore, cinema, and contemporary fiction.
Vampirism is the practice of drinking blood from a person/animal. Vampires are said to mainly bite the victim's neck, extracting the blood from the carotid artery. In folklore and popular culture, the term generally refers to a belief that one can gain supernatural powers by drinking human blood. The historical practice of vampirism can generally be considered a more specific and less commonly occurring form of cannibalism. The consumption of another's blood (and/or flesh) has been used as a tactic of psychological warfare intended to terrorize the enemy, and it can be used to reflect various spiritual beliefs
Astral Time Travel
You can learn to astral time travel while astral projecting. You can visit both past and future realities, but because of factors yet unexplained, you cannot astral project to a specific time and place.
You can only travel to overlap points between the past, present and future realities.
Astral travelling into the past and/or future will require a little more effort than your regular astral projections.
First, you need to find a meaningful purpose and approximate time you want to visit. Once you have figured out what you want to experience, you need to have a very strong desire to visit that time period.
Proceed with the relaxation method that works for you and leave your body. Once you are out of your body, simply think of the place and time and your astral body will immediately be transported. If you don't feel like you belong, you can look at your clothing and wish it were from the right era and it will happen instantly.
Astral Time Travel to the Past
If you look at old photo albums, you can definitely tell that old pictures fade with time. A similar phenomenon occurs when you astral time travel in the past. Your perception of what you see and hear will not be as clear as your regular astral travel experiences, as if the events and astral bodies had faded with time.
You can use time travel to visit and talk to loved ones that have passed away. You can also communicate with people of a different culture and language as languages are not a communication barrier on the astral plane.
Astral Time Travel to the Future
The opposite happens when you astral time travel into the future. Your perception of colors and noises will be very inte
nCan You Change Anything?
Rest assured that you cannot alter our current reality by travelling in the past or to the future because the astral plane is a parallel plane of existence. You should be aware that astral present and physical present (as we know and experience it daily) are both real places but on different planes of existence and may be happening at different times.
Why is such time travel possible? Because of the universal consciousness, which is a realm of knowledge and wisdom. Once you get in touch with this universal consciousness, you have access to an indefinite quantity of knowledge. Perhaps this is how the prophets of our past knew about current events...
If you need help with astral time travel, make sure to review these preparations steps.
You can learn to astral time travel while astral projecting. You can visit both past and future realities, but because of factors yet unexplained, you cannot astral project to a specific time and place.
You can only travel to overlap points between the past, present and future realities.
Astral travelling into the past and/or future will require a little more effort than your regular astral projections.
First, you need to find a meaningful purpose and approximate time you want to visit. Once you have figured out what you want to experience, you need to have a very strong desire to visit that time period.
Proceed with the relaxation method that works for you and leave your body. Once you are out of your body, simply think of the place and time and your astral body will immediately be transported. If you don't feel like you belong, you can look at your clothing and wish it were from the right era and it will happen instantly.
Astral Time Travel to the Past
If you look at old photo albums, you can definitely tell that old pictures fade with time. A similar phenomenon occurs when you astral time travel in the past. Your perception of what you see and hear will not be as clear as your regular astral travel experiences, as if the events and astral bodies had faded with time.
You can use time travel to visit and talk to loved ones that have passed away. You can also communicate with people of a different culture and language as languages are not a communication barrier on the astral plane.
Astral Time Travel to the Future
The opposite happens when you astral time travel into the future. Your perception of colors and noises will be very inte
nCan You Change Anything?
Rest assured that you cannot alter our current reality by travelling in the past or to the future because the astral plane is a parallel plane of existence. You should be aware that astral present and physical present (as we know and experience it daily) are both real places but on different planes of existence and may be happening at different times.
Why is such time travel possible? Because of the universal consciousness, which is a realm of knowledge and wisdom. Once you get in touch with this universal consciousness, you have access to an indefinite quantity of knowledge. Perhaps this is how the prophets of our past knew about current events...
If you need help with astral time travel, make sure to review these preparations steps.
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